will i am's delayed diary

Breakfast at Charms Resort is decent but not great. After eating, we went upstairs to the pool to menyundal . Trust SimonLover to be the perfect artistic director for erotic photoshoots. The locker room had a nice urinal area with a floor-to-ceiling window. We were so into it that we nearly didn't notice the cleaner. Enough with the indoor photography, we switched over to the pool. All sorts of colourful swimwear made an appearance, and we were all showing off our back-arching skills. Did we do any swimming? Of course not. The main event of the day was to visit the Old Town. Surprisingly, Phuket has a heritage of Peranakan culture thanks to the tin mining boom. The Grab dropped us at One Chun Cafe & Restaurant , listed on Michelin Select. We were very lucky to get a table because the lunch crowd was crazy. The food was amazing, and value for money. Nothing like the tourist traps at Patong. The deep-fried prawns with sweet tamarind sauce, and stir-fried crab meat with curry powd...

Compared to SimonLover and ForIHaveSinned, our day started a bit later. When we came out for breakfast, they were already in their transport, ready to head out to the port. For the trip to the animal sanctuary, we had to bring a change of clothes and a towel as we were supposed to get wet. We crowded onto the back of a transport truck together with an Asian DILF. As you can see, his sweaty pits were right in front me.  Kalim Elephant Care was just 40 minutes away, and this was inclusive of a couple of stops at other hotels along the way. The guide gave us a short briefing about Thai elephants and handed each of us bag containing strips of sugarcane. No points for guessing that the elephants love that shit. We got really up close and personal with a family of elephants. Their skin was tough and leathery, with coarse hairs. And their trunks wove around us with amazing agility always sniffing for sugarcane. We walked together with the elephants from one point to the next, taking load...

Sea, surf, and sand holidays are not my cup of tea, so it's no surprise that I had never visited the island of Phuket. The hiao trip had been planned in the last quarter of 2023 with KH, Simon Lover, and ForIHaveSinned. It required me to take only 1 day of leave across the Thaipusam weekend. In my current job, annual leave is very precious as I only have twelve days a year. Please donate me some if you're feeling generous. Packing was done pretty last minute, and you won't believe the amount of skimpy items that I brought. Well, you know, to counter the hot Island weather.  On the day of departure, I left my home at 6AM via GrabCar and met up with the boys at KLIA. Purposely avoided AirAsia due to their recent reputation for flight delays and cancellations. Put our money in Malaysia Airlines. The Aerotrain was still out of service so we took the bus to the terminal. The little time to burn we had to burn before boarding time we spent at the newly-renovated Plaza Premium Lo...

The sixth day of our trip coincided with Kuningan, a major religious celebration in Bali. Everywhere we went, the locals were dressed in either yellow or white. Started the day with mass at Denpasar Cathedral , a fairly new structure with a bare brick facade and white statues. Above the altar was a rotunda with a mural of the Pentecost. While in town, we were dropped off at a shopping mall to do some shopping, and grab a cup of coffee. Shopping never fails to work up an appetite and the choice of lunch at Warung Ikan Goreng Renon was excellent. The fish was fresh and spicy, paired with super crispy bakwan jagung. Evangelisation in Bali was pioneered by two Dutch priests, and through their efforts, the first Catholic church was established-- Gereja Tritunggal Mahakudus . The design is very traditional, and has a Balinese style bas relief above the altar with traditional script describing the Last Supper. The parish priest welcomed us, and even paused an altar aervers camp so that we co...

Sun and skin was the theme for our fifth day at Bali. Pure island excursion with no church visits. Before the crack of dawn, we were herded into our bus with a breakfast box. Pelabuhan Sanur is a busy port, so it was best that we arrive early to beat the crowds. The bus was not allowed in, so we had a brisk morning walk to the port. The port building was obviously brand new, shaped like a sea dragon of Balinese legends. Although we arrived early, it was only 90 minutes later that we boarded the boat to Nusa Penida . Some of us prepared motion sickness medication, but truth be told, it wasn't very choppy. On the island, we broke into small groups of 4 or 5, and got into SUVs. Proper tarred roads were few and far in between, so we were practically bounced for 45 minutes in the vehicle before we got to the attractions. Firstly, we stopped at Crystal Bay , which wasn't an exceptional beach, but there was some eye candy. Compared to the other visitors, we were obviously not embraci...

The fourth day of our pilgrimage brought us to the western end of Bali. Journeyed nearly 4 hours by bus to Palasari with the usual long toilet break at the Alfa Mart outside of Kuta. The architecture of Gereja Hati Kudus Yesus was really unique, imbued with many local artistic influences. Most notable was the array of statues depicting the Twelve Apostles dressed in traditional garb. The church building was built like an aircraft hangar with an ornate altar. Mass was celebrated there followed by Stations of the Cross in the greater church compound. Once we finished the final station, we visited a hilltop Marian grotto with a giant crucifix. The Palasari parishioners showed us excellent hospitality by preparing a traditional, home-cooked lunch for us. The spread included various local salads, satay lilit, and soup. A very delicious lunch. On the way back, we made short toilet stop at Soka Beach .  Our journey back to Kuta took longer than usual due to bad traffic, delaying our din...

On the third day in Bali, we had mass at St. Francis Xavier Church in Kuta . Although it was in town, we had to leave early to avoid the morning rush hour. From the outside, the church looked simple- a white structure, flanked by two low towers. Rather than the usual grotto with Our Lady of Lourdes, SFX Kuta had a statue of Our Lady of Guadalupe, in the presence of four angels. The main church has a beautifully carved wooden tabernacle at the foot of the crucifix. Behind the altar is a mural of angels fashioned to the likeness Balinese celestial beings. After mass, we traveled to the Mandala Complex which is home to multiple houses of worship. On a single row, there's a Hindu temple, Buddhist temple, Protestant church, and lastly a Catholic church. The church was christened Our Lady of All Nations Church . Just a quick visit really, but the parish priest did come out to greet us.  Moved on to our lunch place which was Nyonya's Secret for some Indonesian Peranakan Cuisine. Ki...