Monday, August 31, 2009

Musca Mortality

People are dropping like flies in my company. The number of colleagues diagnosed with life-threatening diseases seems to be on the rise. To date:
  1. A male senior manager underwent a double coronary bypass
  2. A male in-house consultant was diagnosed with irregular heartbeat after feeling unwell during a meeting
  3. A female HR director also underwent a coronary bypass
  4. A senior QA officer recently died after a two-year battle with lung cancer
  5. A female project manager just told me that she's scheduled for an angioplasty

Wondering whether all this is work-related. Lack of exercise. Stress. Long hours. So scary. So young. Time to take more precautions and value life!

Sunday, August 30, 2009


“If left unchecked, the publications can corrupt the morals of society,” said ministry principal assistant secretary (Publication Control Division and Al-Quran Text) Abdul Aziz Abdul Latif.

Definitely bestsellers if given a chance:
  1. Masalah Seksual Yang Anda Malu Tanya
  2. Rintihan Jiwa Seorang Lesbian
  3. Serakah Anak-anak Zombie
  4. Khazanah Mutiara Hikmah Suami Isteri dan Bakal Pengantin

But now.... they have no chance to shine. :P. Anyone know where I can order online? :P.

Friday, August 28, 2009

Zack X Cloud

Recently, I finished playing Final Fantasy VII: Crisis Core on the PSP. Quite a fun game of slash - slash - slash - upgrade - slash - slash - upgrade - slash - slash - slash. You get the picture. Typical FF style, but just that the battle style is not turn-based. The hero is Zack Fair, a member of SOLDIER who loves to do.... squats. Yes, squats. The storyline is the usual blend of Japanese weirdness and CGI eyecandy. And there's the usual romance subplot. Zack loves Aerith (the typical female protagonist), but through the progress of the game, we get to see something funny going on between him and Cloud Strife, a SOLDIER lackey.

Zack Fair: [hears his voice] Embrace your dreams.
[brief pause]
Zack Fair: If you want to be a hero, you need to have dreams.
Cloud Strife: Thank you... I won't forget.
[stands up; bows his head in sadness; once he recovers]
Cloud Strife: Good night
[turns to leave, stops; almost whispered]
Cloud Strife: Zack.

Not that I'm complaining, but I'd prefer something a bit more explicit. :P

Thursday, August 27, 2009

Jalur Gemilang

malaysia flag
Swiped from khae_276.
Is it just me, or does it seem like that the number of Hungry Ghost Festival flags that are flying are comparable to the flags for National Day? So much for the 52nd year of independence. Long weekend. Long weekend. Long weekend. And remember, avoid Bt. Jalil at all cost on Monday morning y'all!

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Scrap It

If you're not going to enforce a law, please scrap it. The head of the government coming out to the press, hoping that she will "appeal", sounds fishy. Might as well just say it outright that the government needs a way to turun pentas. And it kinda implies the executive is meddling with the judiciary. If she wants to go through with it, lantaklah...

Tuesday, August 25, 2009


Jeff recently told me about a famous restaurant near my office, Shin Kee. I was told that the Hainanese Pork Chop is to die for! But that slipped my mind the day I went there with my colleagues, no thanks to the excellent service.

Waiter: What you want to eat?

Colleague: (wondering what to order as there was no menu) Do you have Singapore Bihun?

Waiter: No bihun.

Moi: Wat Tan Hor?

Waiter: No cantonse style.

Colleague: Beef Hor Fun?

Waiter: No beef here.

Colleague: Just Dry Hor Fun?

Waiter: We don't serve hor fun. Only mee and bihun.

Colleague: =_="

Zar dou! The food was OK, but kinda expensive wor.... my Hokkien Mee with sea coconut tong sui cost me MYR10.50.

Monday, August 24, 2009

Dark Chocolate

I just recently watched this short film by Yasmin Ahmad from the 15Malaysia project and I must say that there are many ways to interpret it. It's so brief and full of unspoken moments that one can draw many conclusions from it. In the comments section, people have spoken about inter-racial love, the plight of the non-bumiputera's, racial stereotypes and etc.

Here's what I think:

Hon Kah Hoe is twinky! Dahlah topless!


Sunday, August 23, 2009

Dust It

Dust It
Swiped from williamnyk.
Sprinkle pepper over hot soup, fried noodles and meat marinades to get a zing when you put it in your mouth later. But who would have thought that sprinkling something into your hair would give it a zing too? Well, I'm not talking about pepper anymore, but Schwarzkopf's Osis+ Dust It. On the shaker, it's described as a mattifying powder. You still do your hair as usual with wax or mud, and tsuz it up with the powder later. Surprisingly, the white powder adds volume to your hair and gives your hair shafts a lift! Magical stuff! Will it work down south too? :P

Friday, August 21, 2009

Psycho Ah Long

At my headquarters, there's this manager who's kinda like a loose cannon. Very capable. Very knowledgable. Can handle business and technical by himself. Clear of thought and strong of opinion. A devil on the treadmill. Unfortunately, he's eccentric and can be difficult to work with. His behaviour can be compared to a loanshark as the way he talks is crude and loud. Often uses weird nouns like niau kua (bird melon?!). I'll go so far as to say that he looks deranged and has a wild look in his eyes at times. Loves wuxia novels and frequently quotes them. I suspect he tried learning one of the legendary kung fu and got burnt out in the process (chau foh yap moh). The terrible thing is, he has taken a liking to me. For no reason, he would call my name, "William chai, William chai.....". Occasionally he would come ruffle my hair and remark about my round butt and expanding waistline. Once, he even hugged my waist from behind. Eeeeeeeek...! He's a divorcee, so I'm wondering if he suddenly changed tastes......... I have been trying to avoid him in the toilet. Wish me luck!

Thursday, August 20, 2009

Bali V: You Can Bet Your Tutu!

On the last day of our trip, we got up early for a swim at the pool. Like in BKK, the pool water was salty. No cute boys joined us, just two ang moh women beached like whales at the deck chairs. Finishing up, we went for breakfast. Not much time was left, so we quickly did some last minute packing and KH even managed to squeeze in a quickie at bed's edge. :P. Pak Media was already downstairs waiting for us, so we quickly loaded everything into the APV and headed for lunch. He had recommended Ayam Betutu at a local shop-- Ayam Betutu Khas Gilimanuk, Tuban. Everyone was practically down to their last few thousand rupiah, so we blew it all on lunch. We ordered one Ayam Betutu, half a Bebek Betutu and some Satay Lilit. The poultry was quite nice, but super spicy!!! It went very well with white rice and balinese peanuts. By the end of lunch, my lips and tongue were numb. The skewers of meat were just average. Kinda like meat otak-otak. At the airport, we filled up our feedback form, bid our goodbyes to Pak Media who hoped that we'd return for a longer and more genuine cultural trip next time.

Luckily, our flight was on time, and we even arrived at Kuala Lumpur earlier than scheduled. SK and I accompanied KH while he waited for his connecting flight back to Singapore. Theobroma's hot chocolate and tiramisu really sucked big time. After he left, we went hunting for a cab. Stupid as it is, the only place to buy the cab coupon in LCCT is inside the arrival area. So, if you miss it on your way out, you gotta go back into the restricted area to buy it. Stupid, ain't it? The trip felt so short.... The end.

P.S.: Forgot to mention this-- for cheap, clean and good massage, try Green Grass on Jln. Legian. IDR30k for half an hour foot reflexology and IDR85k for full body aromatherapy massage!

Brotherly Love

Suddenly, my GTalk window pops up....

Pioneer Di: Koorrrrrrrrr....

30 minutes later, an MSN chat window pops up...

Prez Di: Koorrrrrrrrr....

Later in the night before I sleep...

Kynz Di: Kor, not yet sleep ah?

The occasional SMS.

It's great being a kor. :P

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

Bali IV: It Stings!

Swiped from williamnyk.
Sun, sea and surf was the theme for our fourth day in Bali. At around 9:00am, Pak Media whisked us off to Turtle Island for some watersports. Turns out the price of activities there was quite steep when we compared the price to the day trip provided by the hotel, but what to do. We ended up with the glass bottom boat (basically nothing to see, it was just a mode of transport) and the snorkelling at USD30 per person. We took our gear and headed out without much of a talk about safety precautions. Took the boatmen some time to find a good location for us. After putting on the life jacket, flippers and mask, we jumped into the choppy sea. It was such a shock for me to be in such disturbed waters and the water was damn salty. Felt like a salted fish in a jar. I couldn't the hang of breathing and I kinda struggled for some time before I could properly look at the colourful fishies at the bottom. Not that many fishes, but there were more towards the end of the reef, but it was deep waters over there. I scrambled back up on the boat after half an hour. Phewww... felt so good getting out of the water. Unfortunately, the combination of salt water and sun wreaked havoc on my skin. It burned!!! Luckily SK had hyaluronic acid handy. My skin was so dry that applying the moisturizer added even more pain! I'm such a city boy.


Jack also climbed up soon after complaining that a mini jellyfish had kissed him square on the lips. Luckily it wasn't the poisonous type. His lower lips were just a little bee-stung for an hour or so. KH was the last to board, and after he did, we headed for Turtle Island. The place was kinda like a mini zoo of sorts. At the island, we were greeted by a friendly guide who brought us to a pen in the water that housed several large green sea turles. She pulled a 500-kg turtle for us to take photos. It looked very sad. The poor thing looked tortured. According to her, they are affiliated with the government and they release the turtles every couple of months. Moving on, we saw the hatchlings and even had a chance to handle the juveniles. At the back, a menagerie awaited-- phythons, a bat (it kept licking it's banana), an iguana, monitor lizards, owls (one looked like Harry Potter's) and an eagle. All that petting and camwhoring left us tired, so we sat around for a while sipping coconut water. The guide also chatted with us for a while and remarked:

All three of the guys are your husband? You very STRONG woman!!! Hahahahah!!!


Back on the beach, we camwhored a bit and oogled at the para-sailers. Then we changed out of our wet clothes and headed to Garuda Wisnu Kencana Cultural Park, Badung for lunch. The restaurant is nestled up a hill at a park that is supposed to house a giant statue of Vishnu riding on the shoulder of a Garuda. However, due to the ambitious nature of the project and budget constraints, the metal structure (cleverly made to look like granite from a distance) was never finished. So the authorities made do with the torso and arms of Vishnu and the Garuda's head. All three huge parts were displayed separately. The restaurant was beautiful but the lack of patrons was really obvious. Food was mediocre at best. After lunch, Pak Media displayed his skill at the rindik (a bamboo instrument) and SK even tried her hand at. Her musical background did not help her with the coordination. LOL.


Next on our plan was Kuta Discovery. Quite a nice mall where we did some shopping. KH and Jack both bought sports shoes, while SK bought a batik blouse from Batik Keris. I on the other hand got nothing for myself, just helped KT to pick out a bikini for her. Leaving the mall, we went to buy some kueh lapis, peanuts and biscuits at a local store. I was amazed that the Balinese version of the layer cake surpassed the Jakarta version due to its lightness and mild taste. But perhaps one would call this not genuine. Dinner was at Formosa Restaurant, where we unfortunately ran into busloads of mainland Chinese tourists who were talking loudly, smoking in a air-conditioned premise, getting drunk on their personal stock of rice wine, while their daughthers were serenading everyone else with their bad karaoke! And some uncle in the toilet cubicle left the door wie open while he jerked his whole body in wild abandon trying to shake off the last drops of pee from his cock slit. :S. Back at the hotel, we packed our stuff and readied ourselves for the journey home.... And amazingly, I didn't skank much!

Monday, August 17, 2009


I've been wanting to blog about this since my flight back from Singapore, but it slipped my mind. Coming in from Denpasar, it was brought to my attention again-- MOH's stupid health declaration form. The content is quite standard really, except for one checklist item--

Are you arriving from a country with H1N1 local transmission as defined in WHO's list?

How the f*ck am I supposed to have that bit of information? Stupid.

Keep healthy people!

Sunday, August 16, 2009

Bali III: A Lot of Monkeys Acting Like Royalty

Early in the morning, we headed out to Pura Taman Ayun, Mengwi. According to our guide, it was originally a small family temple for the royal family there, but it was slowly expanded to attract more subjects to come as to consolidate their political power. A beautifully-manicured green field can be found at the entrance, together with a fountain and a dais where the king used to watch military parades go by. Moving in past the main gates was a drum tower that gives a fantastic view of the grounds. The inner temple was surrounded by a moat. Moving around it, one can see many thatched, pagoda-like shrines (meru) to the mountain peaks. All of them had odd-numbered roofs, except for one which is said to house a spirit of a very capable prime minister who was at odds with the king. Before we made it past the split gate, my batteries died. The same problem that I had in Melbourone-- my charger can't charge outside of Malaysia!!! *&^^%$#@^*&(*)(. Anyway, we go the driver to stop us at a market in Pacung to buy OBSCENELY-PRICED batteries. But beggars can't be choosy lo.


The next destination was Ulun Danu Beratan at Bedugul. The flowers, mist and cool air surrounding this temple at the crater lake's edge really makes for some breathtaking views. Interestingly, the temple was flanked by amphibian guardians, not the usual checkered sarong-clad raksasa. Lunch was a restaurant in Pacung with a fantastic view and natural air-conditioning. While having the delicious tuna satay, blanched melons, string beans and banana fritters, we took in the beautiful view of tiered rice terraces below. At the bottom were several thatched houses that were said to be honeymoon suites. Alas Kedaton was our next stop. The so-called monkey forest with the tamer monkeys as compared to Uluwatu. No entrance fee, but one of the 200 odd guides will bring you into the forest to have a close encounter with the primates.


According to our forest guide, they're 3 troupes in the forest, each with their own patriach. They're constantly fighting each other for territory. For IDR1k, one can buy a pack of peanuts and the guide would go "Mut, mut, mut, mut....". Pavlovian instinct kicks in, and a whole bunch of monkeys would come to be fed. They're so spoiled for choice that they'll take the nicest peanuts and discard the rest. We did not venture far into the forest as we were being shadowed by one of the villains of the forest. Notorious for grabbing stuff and going all gaga on tourists, even our guide threw the pack of peanuts and asked us to flee when it came a-grabbing! Walking back out, we had more fun at the nearby temple. I produced a pack of Mentos, and the park guide used it to lure the monkeys onto our shoulders. SK had a shock when a monkey leapt onto her back from behind and kinda used her head and face as hand holds. :P.


The forest also had bats, and some of them were domesticated or more likely drugged with lotsa sugary drinks. The hyperglycaemic bats (with a wingspan of one depa!) seem content hanging upside-down from their perch and letting tourists take buddy-buddy pictures with them for IDR30k. I stayed far-far away! The catch of Alas Kedaton is, after the guided tour, you must stop by the guide's shop to take a look. They will give you a sob story and you'll be compelled to buy at least something at an inflated price. Oh well. Next up, was a leisurely drive down to Tanah Lot. We had plenty of time to kill ther before the sunset. Starting out at the west end, we saw the splendour of Tanah Lot and Batu Bolong. Then we moved closer to Tanah Lot. The beach is ridden with rock and the water is so cool and clear. It was thronging with people wanting to a closer look at the holy snake (very zebra-like) and holy spring. The whole of Tanah Lot is not exactly natural as some of its aspects were renovated and reinforced with cement and given a natural look.


The sun was scorching, so by around 5:30pm, we scrambled back up to the east side of the cliff to sit at one of the cafes there. Perfect place to have a beer and wait for the sunset. As the sunset came at around six plus, it was a bit difficult to take a clear shot as there were a lot of tourists. And to make things worse, the horizon was covered by a layer of very thick clouds, making the sunset a let down. :(. However, when we were walking back to the parking lot, we caught a fantastic sight of hundreds of bats flying out of their cliff-side caves! Dinner was Chinese food! Back at the hotel, we claimed our welcome drink (after 3 days!) and had a party at the poolside with a pack of Lays and sweet strawberries from Bedugul. We camwhored and laughed the night away... No skanky-skanky that night as had to conserve energy for Turtle Island the next day!

Saturday, August 15, 2009

Tofu Succubus

SK is a succubus. A tofu succubus. It happened ever since she was diagnosed with IBS. When we go out for dinner together, if there's a fried tofu dish (local tofu ke, jap tofu ke, semua hentam)... she will quietly suck out the innards and leave me the fried shell. I only get the scraps... Will I become one too at this rate?! Save me!

P.S.: She won't be back in KL till Monday, so the usually unpublishable can see the light of day!

Friday, August 14, 2009

Bali II: The Tao of Bali

Warning: Super long post ahead!

On Wednesday morning, we got up early to sample the buffet breakfast at the hotel. The usual fare of sausages, eggs, toast, porridge, fried rice, fried noodles and etc. The coffee was bad. Pak Media was dressed to the nines that day as it was a religious festival (a day of warding one's heart against evil intent). He wore his songket and he had his headgear on with a frangipani tucked at the back. A few grains of rice were stuck on his forehead. The drive to Batubulan was quite pleasant as the roads were in quite good condition. Not ridden with potholes like in Malaysia. I noticed that our driver was overly fond of the horn. It sounded every five minutes for every little "disturbance" in his line of sight. KH and I just snuggled at the back seat the whole time. We had around 20 minutes before the Barong performace started, so Pak Media recommended that we head backstage to camwhore and look at the preparations. The whole time, the gamelan orchestra was there providing the music. So fun looking at them play. So selamba they way they hit the gender wayang without even looking. And the lone flute in between, so exotic.


The play basically represents the eternal fight between good and evil. Barong represents the good spirit, whereas Rangda represents the darker half. In the prelude, the Barong emerged from the doorway, playfully looking at its feet. The gamelan beat perfectly to the footwork and when the Barong finally descends to the stage, the music immediately changes. The first act is among my favourite because it featured two female dancers representing the servants of the Rangda, dancing the typical intricate eye, neck and finger movements of Balinese dance. The dance is mixed with some elements of entertainment for the tourist's entertainment. One can see the actors using the "thumbs up", water balloons and there was even a part where the boar's tail is mistaken for a penis. According to our guide, the sacred Barong is performed for hours on end till the wee hours of the morning, in stark contrast to what we saw. In between, we had the Kris Dance where the actors try to pierce themselves with a kris. The Rangda defeats them all and the Barong brings them back to life. At the end, nobody turns up the winner, signifying that with good, there is always evil.


Moving on to Celuk, we stopped at one of the local silver smiths. Super expensive stuff. Couldn't afford anything, but at least we saw some cratfsmen at work, using traditional silver bead applique. Cheryl was surprised to see that even the Rangda is made into amulets, as negative energy can repel negative energy. Another interesting thing to note was the shop's extensive and opulent family temple at the back, complete with ceremonial dais for marriage and funerals. Before lunch, we had a sampling of Ibu Oka's famous babi guling-- juvenile piggy roasted on a spit, served with secret sauce. It was superb, not too oily, more palatable than our local suckling pig that turns you off after a few pieces. Made another stop at a local product shop with loads and loads of wood carvings. Lunch was at Kintamani. The view of the volcano was obscured by lots and lots of mist. So it was kinda a let down. Food was so-so, but the air was very nice. Cool and clean. Was quite smitten by the tuna satay. Lotsa vendors in front of the restaurant. Like flies. We were told to stay away from them as they're notoriously dishonest.


Not stopping at Batur Lake, we headed downhill to a nearby coffee plantation. Had a free tasting of Balinese coffee, hot chocolate, ginger tea and ginseng coffee. Forking out IDR30k, we sampled the kopi luwak-- coffee made from beans that came out from the other end of a civet cat. I found it a little smoother but taste-wise, I did not detect the complex tastes as described. All the coffee were super-black and unfiltered, leaving a thick tar-ish residue at the bottom of one's cup. Pak Media explained that Balinese coffee was best enjoyed cold. Sip a little and leave it. And the last gulp would be the best. Our guide was also busy telling us about the virtues of kopi jantan. You can guess what it does. :P. Tirta Empul at Tampak Siring was our next stop. Everyone had to wear a sarong and put on a sash. As it was a religious feast day, the temple was packed. Throngs of people were in the sacred bathing pool, lining up to cleanse themselves at the many spouts lining the pool. According to legend, the sacred water welled up from the ground where King Indra stabbed his kris in his war against King Mayadenawa.


On our way back, we stopped a while at Goa Gajah, a unique T-shaped cave that was hewn into the rockface and used for meditation. Inside, we were surprised to see a Caucasian woman in a lotus pose in front of the Linga Yoni. Outside were several bathing pools that our guide mentioned is believed to preserve youth. My batteries were exhausted by then, so no piccies. So sad. :(. And since I have no photographic evidence, I don't remember what I did! :P. More sex at night, that's for sure! :P. Spa was next on our list. Pak Media recommended us De Abian Spa and for IDR300k, we had a 2-hour session with a foot scrub, full-body aromatherapy massage and avacado lulur. The massage was quite interesting as Balinese style differs from the Thai style I had tried previously. The movements usually sweep up, rather than sweep down. And the therapist was quite careless as she quite frequently brushed my balls!! Pening. But no "reaction" la.


When we arrived back at the hotel, we ventured out on our own again, walking the stretch of Legian to Kuta and back via the beach. That basically nullified my earlier spa session. The long walk kinda left all of us tired and cranky (me at least, :P). But back at the room, the lovin' melted it all away...

Wednesday, August 12, 2009


Swiped from williamnyk.
Another gift from my dear SK. Jangan jeles ya! She surprised me with it when she picked me up from the airport from my Singapore Siesta. It's a silver necklace and pendant from Marc Jacobs. The pendant has a disc that spins, and when it does, the seemingly random characters on its surface combine to read I LOVE YOU. Hehe. So cute! Thanks again dear! Have a safe trip to Kuching.

Tuesday, August 11, 2009


View from 2212
Swiped from williamnyk.
Hi guys and girls. It's story time again. This time about my trip to the beautiful island of Bali. Four of us (Jack, SK, KH and I) bought the tickets in 2008 and we only finalised the details about a fortnight before the trip. SK played a big part liasing with Jack in regards to the lodging and tour arrangements. Such a hassle. I hate handling these details. Hehe. Anyway, the trip was from a Tuesday to a Saturday and since I have so much leave to burn, I took the Monday off as well to spend time with KH. In the morning, I went to TM Point with my mum to disconnect our CDMA line and settle a few chores, while KH got his hair done at Centro (the HSBC promotion thing). I met KH at The Gardens at around lunch. The stylist gave him a good cut and colour. I definitely approve. Lunch was at Canton-i. A word of advice-- if you're hungry, don't order the stir-fried pork belly noodles, it's usually the last to arrive. Their fried beef hor fun is quite good, but it's a bit too oily for my liking. Later, we went shopping for Bunny's birthday present and scoured the shelves at Cold Storage for SK's low-fat snacks (to alas perut as the food in Bali is probably too oily for her).

During my stay at The Gardens, I used my credit card several times and due to some kind of sui-ness, I left my Citibank Mastercard at Caring Pharmacy. The cashier handed me the credit card receipt, but not my card. I was so careless. Sigh. I only found this out after I came back from Bali. Turns out that Citibank advised Caring to destroy my card, and I will have to pay MYR50 for a replacement and redo all my auto-debit. Ish. The next day, Apollo fetched SK, KH and I to LCCT. But before that, we had a Leong Nga (Sister) (stupid family squabbles) YTF lunch at Serdang. Lunch was a bit sombre as SK received a stupid warning letter from PTPTN threatening her with a travel ban if she does not do a full settlement on her loan and my temper flared at KH due to a misunderstanding (sorry baby!).


Jack met us at LCCT with his surgical mask on, but after a while, he got sick of it and threw that aside. We burned time at Old Town Kopitiam and I must say that the white coffee there is below par. The flight was quite pleasant with just a slight delay. During the flight, KH and I read several chapters of Armistead Maupin's "Michael Tolliver Lives". Funny gay writing. On the plane, we ordered some water, green tea and nasi lemak. For your benefit, let me say that the food portion has shrunk dramatically and that MYR4 can only buy you 350ml of mineral water now. The best deal would be the green tea at MYR5 for 500ml. Gawd... I'm turning into an Actuarist. :P.

The landing was quite smooth, but it was a bit scary as the runway was near to the coast. We were cruising quite near the sea level. :S. Upon arrival, we were greeted by our elderly tour guide:

Nama saya Pak Media. Iya. Seperti media massa ya.

Talk about a catchy name. As he brought us to the van, we were given garlands of frangipanis. The fragrance was over-powering! Our ride was a brand new Suzuki APV. The first order of business was to get out tummies filled. Our driver drove us to nearby Jimbaran for a seafood BBQ dinner at Melasti Cafe. Our table was way out on the beach! My first time stuffing my mouth while listening to waves crashing on the beach. Unfortunately, we missed the sunset due to the flight delay. Quite a big spread with soup, crabs, prawns, mussels, fish, kangkung, squid and fresh coconut juice. Heavy traces of coconut was found in all of the dishes. :S. Post-dinner, we walked along the beach for a while.


The night ended with us checking in at Legian Paradiso Hotel. Nice, but old. No lifts, as the blocks were only 2 storeys high. Sad to say, the bathroom kinda had a mildew-y smell and the bedsheets felt too unclean for my liking. I had them change it all the next morning after KH and I christened the sheets with some DNA...

Sunday, August 09, 2009

Datin WanAbe

On Thursday nights at 10:00pm, there's this short Malay comedy on TV3 entitled Datin Wanabe that really caught my attention. It revolves around a Malay family that's trying VERY HARD to climb up the social ladder. But truth be told, it's just the wife, Kat who desperately wants to do so. She's the star. With her perfect hair, half-inch makeup and awning-like eyelashes, she strives to live the SUPER DATIN life. Her husband, Bakar loves her and pretty much lets her do what she wants although he's just a clerk in the civil service. While her children, Faiz and Fazi are often the victims of her machinations. Then there's the maid who doesn't look like the maid. Kat is forever showing off to the neighbours, making calls to her fellow Datins and just generally being annoying and deluded. Here are some of my favourite scenes:

Kat: Saya mahu Faiz jadi HO-MO-SEK-SUAL.

Fazi: HAR! ME-TRO-SEK-SUAL la Mak....

Kat: ME-TRO-SEK-SUAL? Ar u shu-re?


Kat: Bila abang angkat golf set masuk tu kan bang, lambat-lambat sikit ya. Biar bagi NEI-BOR-NEI-BORs kita nampak.

Bakar: Ya, sayang.

Kat: Angkat tinggi lagi. Angkat tinggi lagi!


Kat: (flagging down a patrol car) Polis! Polis! Tolong! Saya kena culik tadi!

Policeman: Cepat, naik kereta. Saya bawak ke balai!

Kat: Boleh hantar saya ke TV3? Nak naik Buletin Utama...

Do you wanna be a Datin?

Tuesday, August 04, 2009

Bali Mali

Hi guys and girls,

FYI, I will be on holiday from Tuesday till Saturday with the boyfie, SK and Jack. We will be in Bali soaking up the sun, sights and culture. Pray that we manage to skirt the tenacious flu and terrorist shenanigans. If you're lucky, I may come back with loads of sun-drenched cuties in my spy cam. Hehe. The week didn't start as well as I expected with work troubles and all, so I think I will just shut that part of mind off and enjoy the time off!!!

See you soon!

Sunday, August 02, 2009

Ave Santa Anna II: Jack and Jill Went Up the Hill

Swiped from williamnyk.
In the morning, SK told me that her sleep was interrupted, not by the hooligans from yesterday, but by my mum! My mum has a penchant for talking in her sleep and when she does, the voice is quite spooky and panicky. SK thought it was a ghost! We got dressed and by 07:15am, we were at the coffee house having breakfast. The nasi lemak was crap, but the porridge was better. And as SK was getting some toast, she found some little keong frolicking in the bread basket. :S. After having our fill, we boarded the bus and headed to Maxwell Hill. Due to our lateness, the 4WDs had already left. Since the road is very winding (like a bobby pin with VERY sharp corners), steep and is single lane, they have a time slot for vehicles going up and down. So our group broke up into several batches. I sat in a 4WD whereas SK and my mum got onto an open air truck not unlike those you see DBKL using. The drive up really got my adrenaline pumping. Not only did they have to drive up at a high speed (momentum I guess), the bends were very difficult to manoeuver. Imagine 30 minutes of that with hysterical mumblings from a terrified old auntie! And the best thing was, the back door opened halfway and thank goodness I didn't tumble off!


The peak of Maxwell Hill was a big yawn. The view wasn't great. There was nothing in particular to capture on my memory card. Due to the whole traffic scheduling thingy, we had only 15 minutes to look around. I didn't mind. The trip down wasn't as scary as I thought, but we did have a close shave with another 4WD that did not sound its horn when going up. Lunch was at the same restaurant in Taiping. But after our numerous complaints, the food improved tremendously. Before leaving Taiping, we stopped a while a Taiping Lake. Quite a beautiful lake with Perak's mountainous terrain in the background. And the old trees arch across the road and onto the surface of the lake. Camwhoring ensued. I lost to the gaggle of aunties. Halfway during the shoot, one pair of aunties got so skanky that the bus driver repeatedly horned at them. Back on the bus:

Auntie: Haiyoh, that Ken (bus driver) so bad keep on horning at us just now! Saw I play les wor!

And back in the elevator of the hotel before we checked out:

Auntie: Nice or not? Nice or not? Nice or not? (while humping the auntie in front of her!!)

Yeah, I had pick my jaw up from the floor. Leaving Taiping, we headed for Ipoh. Stopped at yet another confectionery shop in front of Perak Tong (means Perak Cave, not Perak rubbish bin). Watched a little bit of "Shinjuku Incident" on the bus. Lovely seeing Daniel Wu with eyeliner and wig. Dinner was at Bukit Beruntung. Horrible food. Halfway through the food, a rat scurried up the wall beside me. Ugh. Upon arrival in KL, mum immediately went to some DAP fund-raiser in Puchong and I headed home to rest.

The end.