will i am's delayed diary

Muddy Mudskipper Swiped from twm1340 . For years and years, I visited my late aunt at her fishing village at Bagan Sungai Burung ( near Sabak Bernam ) and the one thing that always fascinated me was the mudskippers behind her house. I would thrown si ham shells at the buggers they would either scamper or just stare at me blankly with their weird eyes. Little did I know that they had a secret-- they're used as an aphrodisiac. I first heard about from my colleague. Banting folk cut 'em up and smear the blood over their peckers for erectile problems!! Shocking, right? Even more shocking is when I saw this selling in my neighbourhood pharmacy: Virile For Men is a penis cream with exotic Periophthalmodon schlosseri (mudskipper la!) pheromone extract blended with essential secret aphrodisiac herbs suitable for treating premature ejaculation, giving enormous erection and lasting pleasure thus radually increasing your penis size.... The cream is formulated with aromatic emoll...

HotAirBalloon Swiped from williamnyk . I usually work on Saturdays, but that week, I couldn't care less about the project and decided to take things easy. However, it doesn't mean that I slept in and holed myself up the whole day watching DVDs and stuffing my face. Instead, I woke up at 7:00am to send my mum to her seminar at Sunway Resort Hotel, whereas SK and I went to the wet market. Thought that perhaps Xavier and Damon would join us for breakfast at Sri Petaling, but it was an "ungodly" hour and they weren't up yet. Had some mamak food and made a trip to the pharmacy. Then we headed to SK's place where I got my weekly dose of the internet ( stupid P1 covers BK5 and Taman Equine but conveniently overlooks Taman Puncak Jalil **sulk** ). On the other hand, SK prepared a lunch of porridge, pig kidney in rice wine, fried fish, luncheon meat, stir-fried celery and century quail eggs. Xavier and Damon had finally awoken and joined us for lunch instead....

Marmalade Swiped from williamnyk . In my sulky state of having been overlooked for this year's Maulidur Rasul Award, I made my first visit to Plaza Mont Kiara. On that drizzly morning, I sent my mum for her eleven o' clock appointment at Cahya for a body scrub and a hot stone aromatherapy massage, compliments of my hotel membership thingy ( a repeated con! ). SK and I had two hours to kill, so we went roaming around the place. SK managed to get a Roxy dress at some parallel import place and we were so bored that we even went into the Asiana Mart and other stores. The presence of security personnel is high and they are very friendly. Gurkhas I think, with their hats. After forty minutes or so, we parked our behinds at Marmalade , a place recommended by our neighbourhood foodie, Jason Jr. Fruit juice, cappucino and a generous slice of carrot cake. It had a nice frosting and was topped with none other than marmalade. Quite nice. Before we knew it, we were back up at the...

I'm taking five days of annual leave next week for a prolonged conjugal visit to Singapore. It's my chance to relax a little from work, clear leave and try my hand at domestic life with KH. Effective today, the boyfriend has barred me from all skanky activities until I touchdown at Changi! Really have to mark the days... >_<" Hehe. -- Regards, William

It has been ages since I blogged about the weird and wonderful personalities on KL's light rail transit system. And so, I'm back with two new additions and an update on a regular. To start it off, I'll have you know that Fabio has finally cut off his long, luscious locks for a shorter look. Kinda like Madonna or Anita Mui. Hopefully there isn't some Samson and Delilah story behind the drastic change. The first newcomer is Mangaka. On the whole journey, he just sits there doodling anime schoolgirls in his sketchbook. He flips from page to page, finishing a detail here, ending a stroke there, only to begin back at where he started. Amusing. The second is Mr. Read-Aloud. Believe it or not, he reads the newspaper aloud like when I did in primary one. I don't know if it's a force of habit or an attempt to improve his pronunciation, but I personally feel that the LRT is not the right place to do that. But if he didn't, he wouldn't have found his thirty second...

The President of my Di Association recently presented me with a cute Paul Frank button badge during his last trip to KL. So gwai ! He bought it so that SK could buy her Paul Frank undies at half price. Watch out people, she's amassing a huge collection as we speak. Definitely someone to look out for in the underwear collector's race. And so, I present the latest family tree for your perusal. Already at v1.2. Several changes have taken place. Among the most notable are Lifebook becoming SK's gor ( a rich one, mind you ) and my di Kenz breaking up with Rich ( :( ). Oh yeah, and SK is no nearer to getting inseminated by Alex. You guys can set up a betting pool. But beware of Savante tilting the odds by means of alcohol... oppps.

With the sleep still in her eyes, mum went downstairs to use some eye drops for her dry eye syndrome. In her blur-blur state, she instead grabbed a bottle of Betadine (iodine antispectic). It took her a while after the burning sensation set in that she noticed!! Aiyoh.... -- Regards, William