will i am's delayed diary

ZangToiCafeLeumas Swiped from williamnyk . A fortnight ago, L2 made a lunch appointment with me. We ended up meeting at Zang Toi's West 57th Street Cafe , The Pavilion. First and foremost, I must commend L2 for his punctuality and he was kind enough to keep us updated on his location. Hard to believe, but a rare trait these days. He took some time finding the place as it's hidden inside Parkson. When I told him that it was on the same floor as the women's lingerie, he was horrified. "Lingerie!? Where la? You know I don't walk into the women's department!" But he finally made it and we sat down and ordered. While looking through the menu, L2 was busy commenting about the mirrors more than the food. Apparently he wants me to get him a full length Zang Toi mirror as a housewarming gift when he purchases his dream home. MYR4900. Basket. He claims that the mirror makes him look cute. For that price, it better. Everyone ordered something different. I we...

If you bought last Sunday Star, I'm sure you would have glanced through the acompanying edition of MStar , The Star's weekly Malay tabloid. There's this 2-page focus on our Angkasawan, Datuk Dr. Sheikh Muszaphar. The article mentions much about his impending marriage on the 10th of October. Supposedly the 'wedding of the decade', to be witnessed by 100 astronauts from 35 countries! Sounds exciting doesn't it? A good attempt to trump the Siti-Datuk K wedding. Unfortunately, if you look at the photoshoot, he doesn't look like he's on top of the world. Just read his eyes. So pained. It's as though someone stabbed his heart with a keris and twisted it for good measure. Isn't he looking forward to spending the rest of his life with the woman he loves? Or is he pining for something else? The unreachable castle in the sky ....?

RAF B-24 hit by falling bombs 1 of 3 Swiped from TailspinT . While I was out from the office, two of my colleagues dropped resignation letters on my boss' flabby lap. He was caught by surprise and immediately went into crisis mode. I must admit that it was impeccable timing as there's too little butter for too much bread at the moment. According to my colleagues, the pair of them had been behaving weirdly for the past weeks. Too many phone calls that needed to be picked up in private. One after another. Apparently both had job offers already. So, Fatty ushered them into the meeting room and tried his usual spiel on them. Brainwashing and planting the seeds of doubt and false hope. They weren't too impressed. So he kept on badgering them and even used my GM as a trump card. Somehow, my GM managed to convince them to stay quite to some of my colleagues' disappointment. It would have been a good lesson for Fatty. Something to rub in his face. Something to make him...

The Gaping Maw Swiped from J J N . Some two months, Fu already booked me to attend DL's birthday celebration. Apparently, he was afraid of being bored to death, so he invited SK and I to entertain him. Well, I'm glad that he did cause the whole party was one big eye opener. The party was at DL's house in Bangsar. A three-storey monstrosity that has a winding ramp up from the gate at the bottom. Luxury and antique cars greeted us at the porch. We were about to take off our shoes when one of the staff asked us to walk right in. O.o. So we nimbly stepped on to the carpeted flooring and proceed upstairs. His personal assistant bade us to sit and got us drinks. He was a bit disappointed that we declined alcohol. Catering was by Equatorial Hotel and the spread was prepared in the courtyard on the 2nd floor. A nice view of Bangsar and the swimming pool. Kekiasuan yang teramat , we were the first guests there. Sat in the living room for a while chit-chatting with the birt...

IMG_7709 Swiped from SamOwenson . Mark was in town again the other day for his KL cari makan trip again ( :P ), so he unilaterally appointed me as his official orginiser . Rounded up some folks that he would like to see for a simple dim sum lunch at Yuen Garden , Puchong Jaya. As usual, the waiters were still as underage, but I think food quality has diminished. Won't be going back there anytime soon. SK and I were the earliest to arrive. And we were both cranky as we did not get enough sleep and had woken up early to do our weekly marketing. The waiters were as young as expected, but no cuties upstairs this time. Blegh. By 12:30pm most of the guests had arrived with the exception of Ichi. It was his first time in Puchong and he did not refer to any maps nor asked any directions before the big day. Ichi: Erm... I'm lost. At Giant. Moi: That's Bandar Puteri, not Puchong Jaya. Head out on the ramp and make a right. You should see IOI Mall on your left. Ichi: Can I ...

Roast Pig BBQ - Scary Swiped from dubesor . "Anwar promised DPM posts to PAS and DAP says Zahrain" Of course he promised them something! Don't tell me the BN Coalition members work for free?! No post, no perks, no contracts, no nothing? For the sake of the rakyat ? Please la. Distributing the proverbial "roast pork", that's the way politics works. Tell us something we don't know.

Danbo's To-do List Swiped from willycoolpics. (...) . L2 tagged me ages ago. But the bun is finally out of the oven, although it's a bit burnt. Don't complain and just chew off the carbonized bits will ya! :P. And Janvier, i'm more receptive to memes these days... specially when inspiration runs low. :P. 1) DRAG - This is high on the list after seeing Magus' and Mother Hen's transformations. I think I can do well. My hiao-ness is quite natural and I need not shave ( just my pits perhaps ). Just need to find a flattering dress and a good makeup artist. Any volunteers? Hehe. 2) TASTE GEODUCK - DanielH planted this idea into my mind. KH... can I? **puppy dog eyes** 3) WAKE UP BESIDE KH EVERY MORNING - It would be great if I wake up and see KH serene face beside me every morning. I could just reach over and touch his face, give him a kiss. One drawback though, would definitely be late to work at times due to morning skanking! 4) OWN MY OWN PROPERTY - P...

Bride 'n Groom-3.19.08 Swiped from barryshap . Last weekend, I was invited to 2 weddings, one on Saturday and one on Sunday. I declined the wedding on Saturday as it was in the city center and chose the venue nearer to my place at Bt. Jalil Golf & Country Resort . However, I later found out that the wedding banquet on Saturday was quite grand as The Bankers' Club had a great night view of the city and the bride changed into 4 gowns. And you know what? She changed her hair for every gown! I was told that the transformation was so fast that it was though she plopped on wigs. Her stylist must have had some F1 pit stop experience. But it wasn't a total loss for me. The wedding that I did attend did have its own attractions. :P. Well, the Queer Quotient ( QQ ) for the dinner was quite high actually. Upon arriving, my dar had pinged a young'n at the lobby. Turned out to be one the groom's relatives. Then a fabulous couple arrived with too many buttons undone...

how_to_kill_a_chicken_poster Swiped from madamfufu1959 . My hairstylist, KK posed me this question while he was cutting my hair the other day: "Do you know how to shut a chicken up?" Shocking, isn't it? Haha. It turns out that his neighbour rears chickens in the backyard and his room faces the reban . And so, KK gets an earful of cockerel orchestra every morning. I gave him the simple solution of KFC-ing the chicken, but he seems to wanna do it the Gandhi way, so therein lies the problem. He has comtemplated chloroform. Asked me about possible poisons that can mute chickens. Chick-napping. "How about throwing a monitor lizard or phython into the compound?" "I think the kids would be eaten too." So difficult. Straightforward solutions are always the best. I think he should just get ear plugs. Haha. Or perhaps he can contact the authorities? But I guess they won't come for just 2 chickens. :S.

Love between parents and babies Swiped from Teresa Marques . Mum had complained of pain at her elbow and the back of her heel, so I sent her Tung Shin early Saturday morning. CK and SK also tagged along. He had come down from Kajang the night before and we had a nice Japanese plum wine tasting session. Found the wine to be a little mild, so we added a bit of kick to it with Smirnoff. Goes well! Before my mum's turn, I had to endure a straight couple massaging each others' backs and giggling like nobody's business. Felt like whacking the girl with her own crutches, but that's kinda cruel. According to the orthopaedic surgeon, my mum has tennis elbow and her achilles tendon is inflamed. So he prescribed her some arcoxia and medicated plasters and cautioned her against walking on uneven roads and doing heavy lifting. SK got a consultation too for her prolonged shoulder discomfort, but unfortunately she's allergic to the muscle-relaxant. Unlucky! Breakfast was ...

SKJapan201002 Swiped from williamnyk . Here's a little slice of Japan that SK brought back with her. She even smuggled two boxes of sushi in her handbag. :S. Quite an interesting variety. A cute piggy cellphone charm that she got from FOODEX 2010 for herself ( so cute, had to take a pic! ); strawberry and green tea daifuku; edamame snacks ( tastes weird ); A framed-up Japanese doll she got for my mum; Sake ( drunken party ); More sake ( drunken orgy ); Illy Coffee Powder ( caffeine high! ); Meiji Milk Chocolates ( yummy! );

Citibank - New Logo ? Swiped from Velachery Balu . Here are some updates about the credit card tax. Good news if you're a Citibank customer. In order to reduce the exodus of its customer base, Citibank has started to offset a fraction of the credit card tax for 2010. They're willing to absorb it all if you do a little something for them. You scratch my back, and I'll scratch your's. Here's the deal: Call to cancel your card. Their staff will call you to ascertain the reason of cancellation. Do tell them it's due to the oppressive credit card tax. They'll offer you a promotion where they'll rebate you 10% of your credit card charges in the promotion period. The maximum rebate is MYR30. If you're a cheapskate and decide that you do not want to pay the remaining MYR20 as well, then you can register 2 extra auto-billing accounts for a total cash reward of MYR20. Voila! The tax has been waived .

It's been quite some time since I update my underwear drawer, so I present to you the latest additions to my HUGE FAMILY: This time round it's more cartoon-y. Representative of a more light-hearted mood I guess. For actual pics of guys IN UNDERWEAR, do visit SimonLover or Takashi's blog. Hehe. P.S.: Only fresh and unworn undies were used in this shoot. :P

No Left and No Right Trun Swiped from ShaneMorrisPhotography . What do you call someone who can't differentiate between left and right? Leave a comment if you do. Heck, leave a comment if you don't! LOL. Why do I ask? It's because one of my juniors at work has such a condition. On the phone the other day: Colleague: Wei, how do I get to the office? Moi: From Puchong direction, turn right at the junction. At the hospital, turn left. Go up the the hill then turn right before the tall building. The office is just down the road. On your left. Colleague: Errr... What left? What right? Moi: Shit, I forgot. Turn driver side at the juction, then turn passenger side ....... Colleague: Ooooooooooooooo... She managed to find her way. :)

Silly-Billy in Sydney Swiped from williamnyk . It has been more than 3 years since my last "Gnome Around the World" entry. I suddenly got my interest back ( most probably due to the better capabilities of my G11 ) and I'm introducing a new member to the team-- Silly-Billy of House Momiji . I left her in her box for months and decided to let her take a breath of fresh air. Don't worry, Gnome is still with us. You'll see more of him in the later series. In the title pic, we see Silly-Billy at the Vintage Luna Park, Sydney. This is Silly-Billy at Angkor Wat, Cambodia. The beautiful scenery is compliments of CK. Lastly, we see our globe-trekking Momiji in Stockholm's Old Town. I don't remember where I got that postcard from. Until next time, folks!

Speeding Car Swiped from mikeyjay . About a week ago, I sent SK to the airport to catch her flight to Japan. We had allocated two hours. In usual circumstances, it would only take a little over half an over to get to KLIA from my place. And the good thing is, I do not need to pay a single cent of toll. However, that night was a very unlucky night for me. Firstly, 5 minutes away from the KLIA terminal, I missed a turning. The signboard was located at the fork and it was small and peeling. Typical. That stupid mistake cost me 30 minutes. I had to drive all the way to the MEX exit to make a U-turn. So rushed. I drove at break-neck speeds. I don't understand why it's so difficult to turn back to the airport. If you don't have the time, so mistakes can really make you miss your flight. But, there was a silver lining. Due to the lateness, SK was bumped up to Business Class because Economy was overbooked. That made her 7-hour journey much more enjoyable. And on the way ba...

Computer Problems Swiped from Photo-John . Note: Strong language ahead. Children below 5 should be accompanied by a guardian. Citibank Online is nuts. It doesn't let me log in although I key in the correct password. Information not recognized F*ck you. (pardon my French) Information not recognized F*ck you. Information not recognized F*ck you. Three subsequent "failed" attempts and my account isn't locked. How cool is that? This is my third time encountering such a situation. During the last two times, I reset the password with my ATM pin. At first, I thought that perhaps I was forgetful, but this time I documented the password well and no way it's my mistake. And so, I did some testing. During the password reset, I purposely keyed in my known password as the new password. And you know what I get? You new password cannot be same as the current password F*ck you. And when I present these facts to their support staff, they treat me like an idiot. I have 7 y...

Do Not Crack Whips! Swiped from pjchmiel . Former Penang Deputy Chief Minister Mohammad Fairus Khairuddin had this to say when he left PKR: “In line with democracy, we should embrace differences in opinions but I am surprised why undue pressure is put on those criticising the Pakatan Rakyat leaders,” he said, advising former PKR comrades to fight with clear conscience and stick to their principles. Let's see him criticise the Barisan Nasional Chairman then. LOL. I'm sure the whip would crack even faster.

Quilt Swiped from williamnyk . About one year ago I did a meme about the 25 facts of Suneo . Now it's 23. I'll try my best not to repeat anything. If all else fails, I'll just resort to creative writing. - I'm a food processor . I can dump a piece of chicken or an unshelled prawn in my mouth and spit out the unedible parts. I strip meat of bones and even cartilege is not spared. I bloody love the stuff. Sometimes, I down prawn shells as well. - My mum cut my hair for more than 20 years before I settled on my current stylist. I had saved a fortune on haircuts, only to squander it all later in life. Hahaha. Ever since that day, I've also not used a comb! - My childhood best friends were a Punjabi boy and two Chindian sisters. I used to play imaginary games with the lot of 'em, but girls tended to be more emo, so I spent time with the boy more. We usually walked around and talked for hours and hours. I lost contact with all of them. - I only started going for ...

threesome hug! Swiped from Midnight_Shadow-san . On Maulidur Rasul, Pikey and Bear organized a YTF lunch with SK and I. And due to some scheduling problems, Pikey decided to collapse his meet-up with Nicky05, Jino and Edw into the same appointment. Killed two queers with one Prada man-bag. A plus point as I had not met new faces in quite some time. Lunch was at Puchong Yong Tau Fu . They recently opened a branch near my place, so we decided to try. Due to the fact that the fellas were not familiar with the Equine-Serdang area ( very impressed that Nicky05 came all the way from KL area ), lunch was delayed for an hour. I nearly fainted and SK had half turned on her bitch mode. Haha. But luckily there were no casualties. As we sat down to lunch, my ice-breaking ( interrogation ) began. Turns out that all three of them were still studying. Immediately felt old. Jino and Edw make a cute couple and Nicky05 looked adorably nervous. The food wasn't as nice as expected and the fri...

Text Swiped from cecilgene . I miss receiving SMS-es from KH on my DiGi line. It's not that he doesn't text me. He regularly does. But it's on my Starhub line. If it's on my DiGi line, it means that he's standing on the same ground as I am. It means that he's home. It means that I can hold him. Miss you, baby.

Do you know the answer to the question above? Well, the answer is 14 ( 16 even if I include the other two queers at the table behind us ), if you exclude SK. LOL. For the first time, I organized a BFF birthday party for SK. She's always present at BFF gatherings, kinda like a permanent fixture, and yet it took three years for this to happen. I'm such a bad DEAR. Hehe. The initial plan was for a small, intimate gathering of friends and Dears, but in the end, the turnout was quite good! Nihon-Kai didn't make good their promise on giving us a room, so we ended up on a LONG table in the common area. For the comfort of their other guests, it would have been wise to give us a room. Hehe. Since they did not, they got to enjoy our fabulous-ness up close and personal. LifeBook was the earliest to arrive. He deserves an award befitting such a good gor ! The rest slowly trickled in and by 8:00pm, most had arrived. The event was graced by KH & I, Janvier & The Chief, Bunny ( h...