will i am's delayed diary

Misc0114 Swiped from williamnyk . Here's the latest addition to my collection of knickers! ( my drawers are over-occupied so some of 'em have to be squatters now! ) 1) Felix the Cat from Toot ( compliments of KH ***MUACKS*** ) 2) Dugas 3) War is Terrorism from Forbidden ( compliments of KH ***MUACKS*** ) Hehe. Stay tuned.

swimmer Swiped from hagerstenguy . I don't know about you, but I'm usually horny after my weekly swim. Kakaka. ( Jangan fikir bukan-bukan, no woody in my trunks le, but different case if KH's in the pool too, :P ). Increased blood flow? Sign of improved health? Release of feel good hormones? Or just plain horniness on my part? ( likely to be psychosomatic, :P ). Might be a combination of factors. Who knows? So, are you horny after exercise or gym?

Wu Kok Swiped from williamnyk . I usually attend Mandarin mass on Sunday mornings, so it's usually off-limits to social gatherings. But this time round, mum wanted to attend a talk at the Kwang Tung Association, so we celebrated the Eucharist on Saturday evening instead, so she had Sunday morning clear. And so, seeing the wonderful opportunity, I asked Gratitude out for a dim sum breakfast at Yuen Garden , Puchong Jaya. So nice of him to say yes although it was already 3 weeks in a row for him eating there. I would have said no in a heartbeat. :P. The place was easy to find since it was so large and can be seen from Jalan Kenari. We ordered most of the classics-- siew mai, ha kau, wu kok, char siew bao, chu cheong fun, loh mai kai, fung chaw and pai kuat . However, out of those, one could taste the flour in the chu cheong fun , the char siew bao and wu kok was not fragrant enough. And come to think of it, Anton did not get to eat his egg tarts. We washed it all down wit...

Twilight Kids Swiped from williamnyk . On Saturday, I woke up at 6:30am to get ready to send SK and Apollo out to KLIA for their trip SG. Why am I not on that flight you may ask? Well... I'll try to arrange something in December. After sending them off, I still have to resume my wet market duties. Met up with my mum at Taman United market and we later continued on to OUG. Strangely, Taman United was a far cry from the usual hustle and bustle. On the other hand, OUG was really horrible. The whole place was jammed up more than usual. People were double-parked indiscriminately. At bottle necks, we see cars blocking the way and people not giving way-- ultimately causing deadlocks and arguments from the drivers' seats. I really cannot grasp why some people who know that people are waiting for their spot, can take all the time in their world to load and unload stuff and end up not telling people that they actually do not want to leave in the first place! Nothing special this...

lady gaga paparazzi(I just kill my boyfriend version) Swiped from Liu,ShengJi@flickr(I'm from Taiwan) . Note: Forgive me if this a bit outdated. Album baru pun dah keluar! OMG. Save me. I'm addicted to Lady Gaga's "Paparazzi" music video. It's so addictive. It's so quirky. For some inexplicable reason, I find the scene where she emerges from the limo to her mansion and to the point she dances like a broken marionnette on crutches so captivating. The more I watch it, the more I draw comparisons with No Doubt's "It's My Life" . Is Gwen Stefani the first to portray a murderous glam vamp in knickers and lotsa jewellery? Entahlah . Anyway, it's fun watching Lady Gaga... but I wonder how long she'll be staying around. Can she survive till Madonna's age? We'll see... P.S.: I have a colleague that has hair like Lady Gaga ( from "Disco Stick" ). I feel like getting her an over-sized diamond-encrusted thunderbolt ...

Tissot I Swiped from williamnyk . Surprise! Surprise! I still have more birthday gifts to blog about! If you noticed, I did not tell what KH gave me... This was because his gift was belated. But it was well worth the wait! On his last trip to KL : KH: Come over here baby. Sit beside me over at the bed. Moi: K. (...KH faces me...And kisses me deeply, leaving me breathless and wanting more...) KH: I love you. Moi: I love you too... (...My eyes closed...It barely escapes as a whisper...) (...KH takes both of my hands and brings them together...I find my hands cradling a box...) (...I open my eyes and see KH smiling at me...I look down at my hands...) Moi: OMG! Well, maybe it didn't happen like that. Hehe. Tone it down by 75%. And reimagine it again. But it doesn't take away the OMG factor. Holy crap, KH got me Tissot Men's T-Classic PR50 2000 Chronograph! He had ordered it off Amazon some months ago I suspect when he was shopping for a watch for himself. He did show it to m...

Mirage Volcano, Las Vegas Swiped from NikonDavid2007 . According to the Ten Commandments, one should Honour Thy Father and Mother. I'm all for that really. Filial piety is something that is quite inherent in our society. As children, we try our best but I guess nobody ever said it's gonna be easy. Lemme explain to you my complex relationship with my mother. I'll use a parable. Hehe. My mother is like a an active volcano that will erupt at any time and I'm the peasant tilling the soil at the base. The soil is rich and the crops are abundant. The harvest is plenty. However, the volcano is restless. Without warning, it could erupt and spew hot lava and ash. All doom and gloom. And the poor peasant has to run for his life and have his crops burn down into nothing. When things cool down, the peasant moves back in and starts anew. I have been living with my mother ( just her and me ) for many-many years now. The rest of my siblings have always been away from home. I ...

DIGI MAN Swiped from LAU. 108 . Note: This is a follow-up from my visit to DiGi's Customer Service Center at BTS Whenever you call DiGi's helpline, you get this: Dear valued customers, thank you for your continuous support! I'm beginning to wonder why I supported them since my uni days. Let me walk you through their IVR (not "Interactive Voice Response", but "I Very Riled"): [0162990000] {Stupid welcome message. A total waste of time.} Press 1 for information on your account Press 2 for reload Press 3 for service change Press 4 for product information and to speak to customer service team [4] Please hold the line. To listen to the next announcement in current language, press 1. Press 2 to listen in Tamil. Or press 3 to listen to Bahasa Indonesia. [1] Please press 1 to check your PUK number, to request or change your TPIN number. Press 2 for mobile number portabilty inquiries. Press 3 for DiGi's latest promotions, products and services. [3] - TAKE ...

Cobra Swiped from Yorick (tonton yoyo) . Remember the Thai Odyssey voucher I got as a birthday present last September? from EarlGrey and Daemon? I'm sure you don't. Saje tanya . Haha. Anyway, since it has a validity of 3 months, I decided to quickly use it when I had the time. So, last Sunday, SK and I went out to MV at 11:00am. Upon reaching the place at P2, the friendly transgender customer service personnel at the counter scrutinized my voucher and declared that I had come to the wrong place. I should go upstairs to L2. Without asking further, I did so. Upon reaching the branch at L2, I was greeted by another friendly trans-gender customer service personnel ( I suspect she's a Malay pretending to be Thai ). She squinted at my voucher and told me to come back at 12:10pm as all the rooms were full. So, SK and I went around aimlessly, trying to kill time. At about noon, SK decided to go for the Malaysian Association for the Blind massage next door while waiting fo...

Cakes Galore Swiped from williamnyk . The next morning, I was sniffling like nobody' business. A common symptom after a hard night's work and lack of sleep. :P. By 10:30am we were out to Puduraya for KH to buy his bus tickets. Immediately after, we rushed to Jase's belated birthday lunch at Zipangu , Shangri-La. I failed miserably as the event planner-- bad response, though it was delayed by a week. Ended up only KH, SK, Takashi and I attended. As usual, I gorged on the fantastic spread of sashimi and other seafood. But this time round, I was kinda disappointed by the quality of the salmon and raw oysters ( look dehydrated! ). Before leaving the hotel, we went around cam-whoring again. We ended up at the bakery there-- Boulangerie. A quirky place of stacked chocolates, pretzels, giant lollipops and dildo-shaped candy and manned by a Queen of a waitress: Welcome to Shangri-La Booooooulangerieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee... How may I help you? She said that all in one breath...

n6825693_30357891_9397 Swiped from yoyoparlo . Morning came and we stayed in bed till late. It's great waking up beside KH's warm body and getting a morning kiss ( and woody, :P ). It was too cold to leave each others' embrace and go down for a morning swim! So we skipped that and made the best of the luxurious stay in Parkroyal, had a small bite of breakfast and coffee ( Nescafe Gold 3-in-1 from YKLS the night before ). The boyfie was for some inexplicable reason singing "月光光" from yesterday's performance! Creepy! Since our appointment with Apollo and SK was at 1:00pm, we wandered around Bukit Bintang for a bit and KH managed to shop at F.O.S. Not too long after, KH was getting a bit cranky and tired ( too exhausted? LOL ), so we went to Crystal Jade to wait for the rest. Feeling hungry from our "earlier activities", we ordered up a storm of cold chicken marinated with wine, fried rice with prawn, chicken and ham, steamed pork dumplings with chi...

Portraits Swiped from edith . Thanks to Dato' Tony Fernandes, mum and her friends flew off to Kuching for a short trip with her friends on Thursday morning. And so, recognizing a golden opportunity, KH also arranged a trip back to KL on the same day. As I sent mum off at the departure hall in LCCT, SK and I had a long breakfast at Coffee Bean. After an hour or so, I went to the arrival hall to welcome KH into my arms. Everyone had a very early morning, so we all headed home to rest first. Later, SK brought us out to lunch at Restoran Goon Wah as KH was complaining that I did not bring him on makan-makan trips in KL. Hehe. She then fetched us to Suria KLCC as I needed to pick up some makeup for a Mel. There wasn't quite anything to do there, so we took the PUTRA LRT to Dang Wangi and had a long walk to Bt. Nanas Monorail. KH was complaining about the "interchange" as we needed to walk about 10 minutes ( that's KL public transportation for you ). Luckily for ...

Bouncy Ball Swiped from Stuart Zero . Racist comments from “one or two Umno leaders” should be ignored because the majority of members in the party are not racists, said Datuk Seri Najib Tun Razak. The Umno president stressed that the party’s policies had always been fair, inclusive, democratic and open. The problem has been acknowledged. The persons have been identified. So why stop at that? Why have a law if you're not gonna enforce it? At the end of the day, I feel that Umno needs those leaders to make sure that they can satisfy all of their grassroots. Some like racists. Some don't. Of course, the President would have to appear statesman-like, speaking for the masses, but he'll still need "those" people to help him say what he can't say. He'll "chide" them. Ask you to ignore them so that the party can stay "racist-inclusive"? A usual situation: The good news always comes from the Prime Minister. The bad news, that's left to...

shouting-match Swiped from Shamsiye . Ever since my system went live some months back, the senior management have been pushing for some interfaces to other systems. The thing is, after attending several discussions, it is quite clear that the business aspect of the interface seems to be ridden with obstacles. For obvious reasons, everyone wants to protect their turf, hence, the less impact the better. Well, the customer project manager for my system is a very shrewd woman ( lets call her Mother ). Her background in consultancy firms, bulldozer strategies and buddy-buddy relationship with the COO make her a force to be reckoned with. This story takes place after around three or four meetings with the other system ( lets just call them Vendor X ). The ball had fallen back into my court: Mother: From the last meeting, it was said that Vendor X cannot interface to the Host, hence we shall look for alternative's at our end. (........... lots of ding-dong ............) (...........

Well, my letter has finally been published in the October 2009 issue of Men's Health. As requested by Little Dove and the rest, here it is. Truth be told, the monsoon had me out of the swimming pool for a month now!!! Must swim today!!!

Mafia Swiped from Chud Tsankov Illustrations . The AG Report has come and will be gone again soon... Until next year when the Government can flaunt the fact that public funds are blatantly being "wasted" ( I guess something does not go to "waste" if it accidentally falls into someone's pocket ) and the Government basically implies that: 1) there's nothing that YOU can do about it ( unless you vote their ass out ) 2) there's nothing solid that THEY will do about it ( everyone's gotta eat, right? ) Insulting, right? And don't forget that there may be cases of "honest mistakes". Everyone makes mistakes right? Yeah. I call that incompetence. And so, we hear in the papers that the Government can take: They are: surcharge under the Financial Procedure Act 1957; disciplinary action under Chapter D of the General Orders Public Officer Regulations (Conduct and Discipline) 1993; civil or criminal action and investigations by police and ...

All Soul’s Day Swiped from limajulija . In case you did not know, November 1st is All Souls' Day . It is a Catholic Qing Ming of sorts, where Catholics commemorate the departed. And so, each year, my family converges in Teluk Intan, Perak to visit my late-dad's grave at the St. Anthony Church Cemetery. We departed from KL at 6:30am, with little Cyan obviously grumpy from being disturbed from his usual long slumber. The kid was quite restless, climbing from front to back. at times like this, one wishes that Woodwards Gripe Water still contained alcohol. One swig for the baby, another for the poor mum. Stopping at Bidor, we had breakfast at the market and mum bought some flowers, fruits and roast pork. Had the worst-tasting Anson Chu Cheong Fun there..! Such a rip-off. My sister and brother-in-law declared that it tasted of roaches. LOL. But the char siew pao was sedapz. Only MYR1.20. Mana nak cari?! . In Teluk Intan, we also stopped at the wet market also to get what...

Out to Market Swiped from williamnyk . For ages now, I've been waking up at 7:15am on Saturdays to send my mum to the wet market. Our first stop at Taman United, where she'll buy poultry, seafood, pork and vegetables. Most of the time in that particular order. Later, we'll go to the market at OUG. A really horrible place. Packed with people. Full of cars. No parking. Over there, she'll buy more vegetables, fruits, eggs and other groceries at the Chinese medicine hall ( Chinaman's Carrefour-- can you imagine that they sell Gardenia at sub-market price?! ). At both markets, one can see that people in KL really know how to dress up ( or down ). Either they're wearing their most horrible pyjamas or they look like they're at a ball! From some sudden surge of confidence, many women come out to the market with the clothes that they went to bed in. The straight man would be thrilled if they wore negligees and teddies, but the reality is that its most probably a...

Yuen's-Steamboat Swiped from ewinee . Note: Forgive the staleness factor. I blame it on Acer. :P The first time Anton extended an invitation to me was for BKT on National Day. But I had to take a raincheck on that. So, when Anton asked me out again, I tried my best to make it. It was steamboat at Yuen, Sunway. I wasn't exactly keen on that venue ( the owner's cute son doesn't exactly causes my heart to flutter ), but it's the gathering that counts I guess. Was a great chance to finally meet Anton, TZ and Bong in person. Pikey was the earliest to arrive, booking us a table on the first floor. By 6:30pm, Anton arrived and we decided to begin without the rest. By the time TZ and Bong had arrived, I was already at 80% capacity. No real crowd on the Friday night. Must be exam season for students or something. Can you imagine that there was no need to elbow someone to get some grilled chicken wings? That cut down the enjoyment for some people I guess. There were ...

1Malaysia Swiped from Abd Hadi . When I was in secondary school, Mahathir was still in power. He had his iron grip on the country and we all were under the thrall of his Vision 2020 . And because of that propaganda, me and my classmates had to write tonnes of essays on that topic. And we were constantly trying to squeeze that term into our writings to gain some imaginary brownie points. Much later, Badawi came along and but there wasn't a buzzword. I think the late Endon's batik even outshined her husband. Fast forward to the present and we have Najip's 1Malaysia . I'm guessing that students are facing the same thing that I did. 1Malaysia this, 1Malaysia that. Even people in the corporate world and media are trying to outdo each other incorporating that phrase into advertisements and products. So sienz. So boring. So kiss-ass. Jelaskan kesan kemelesetan ekonomi terhadap kemerosotan sahsiah di kalangan belia di negara kita. Karangan anda seharusnya tidak kurang ...

Sassed Up Swiped from *love.charmmy . Note: Forgive the staleness factor. I blame it on Acer. :P Yes folks, this is an account of the 4th celebration of my birthday this year. Don't groan yet, it should be the last for 2009. Hehe. A week in advance, Mel booked my time for a nice night out on a Friday. I was so sick and tired of my Fatty Boss' face that I used it as an excuse to leave the office at 5:30pm sharp. Because the appointment was at 6:30pm, I had some time to kill at Midvalley Megamall. Managed to meet up Apollo there although it was his day off, so we had a quick chat. Dinner was at Delicious and we ordered the duck curry with lychees ( weird, but recommended ) and the Thai-style steamed seabass. Mel dressed up for me, wearing a brown dress that showed off her boobs nicely ( I would have preferred more cleavage, but it's wasted on me anyway, hehe ) and even had makeup on. We did our whole attention-grabbing kopi susu BF-GF routine and even managed to camwhore...

Would You Die For The Glory Of Russell's Teapot Swiped from Dude Crush . Acer finally called to say that my lappie has been given clean bill of health. Time to go collect it and pay the huge hospital bill. Hopefully the technician did not find any stray porn or erotic pictures lying around. Now I can continue my Flickr-ing and blogging of my stale posts ( birthday celebration posts are still pending.... and it's already November!!! ). Hehe. Long overdue since the photos that I require are inside the lappie. I kinda miss it. It has been an awkward two weeks trying to work using SK's laptop. But still, it's definitely better than using my old PentiumIII 600GHz. Can't wait to be reunited with my lappie....

Tax Return Swiped from NotInventedHere . Recently our DEAR PM announced "goodies" during the 2010 Budget and also the infamous credit card tax. He said that the rakyat should take into consideration the substantial savings before commenting about the "small" credit card tax. MYR50 per card cannot pay meh?! Heh. Let's do some calculation. I normally don't like to use my brain, but I'll make an exception today. Let's refer to Borang BE 2008 . The scenario is a middle-class wager earner with MYR4000 a month. C16 - Penggajian 48,000 D1 - Individu dan saudara tanggungan -8,000 D8 - Pembelian buku -1,000 D12 - Insurans Nyawa & KWSP -6000 D13 - Insurans Pendidikan & Perubatan -1,000 E1 - Pendapatan Bercukai 32,000 E2a - Cukai ke atas 20,000 pertama 475 E2b - Cukai ke atas baki 12,000 (@ 7%) 840 E4 - Rebat Cukai Individu -350 E9 - Jumlah Cukai Yang Dikenakan 965 Now let's look at the projected Borang BE 2009 for the same scenario. An extra M...