Friday, July 31, 2009

Ave Santa Anna I: Novena

Mel taught me this prayer way back when I was in university:

St. Anne, St. Anne,

Find me a man,

As fast as you can!

At that time, I was still in the closet and I had not yet embraced Catholicism. But perhaps I was subconsciously praying to St. Anne for such an intercession and she answered with KH. Years after that, I finally made the pilgrimage to St. Anne's Church, Batu Mertajam. For MYR230 per pax, SK, mum and I followed a church trip there. Luckily, SK and I weren't the youngest participants in the group of aunties and uncles. Leaving on Friday night, we arrived there at around 5:30am. At that hour, there were already volunteers on duty! I had been sleeping the whole trip. Mum had quite a time smacking me awake. Upon arrival, we freshened up and did the stations of the cross in candlelight. It was kinda like a treasure hunt, looking for the life-sized statues in the dark. Finishing the stations, we prayed at St Anne's Shrine, collected some St. Anne's Water and climbed the St. Anne's Hill at the back.


Breakfast was at the Bukit Mertajam wet market. We ordered hokkien mee (prawn mee that has Ah Xian's seal of approval, served with big prawns and chicken feet, but too oily and normal in my opinion), roast pork, pork noodles and flat noodles in soup. Even had cakwe with black coffee. Such a nutrituous start to the day. After filling our tummies, we drove for ninety minutes to Taiping. Believe it or not, all hotels in the vicinity were fully-booked, so we had to stay so far away. At Taiping, the first thing we did was stop at some confectionery shop. Then just a few lots away was our restaurant. The food was horrible. Next, we checked in at Legend Inn. The place was quite nice, but we had to switch rooms as the air-conditioning was shot. It was clean and there were no unpleasant odours. The rooms were fitted with LCD TVs too.

We had about 5 hours to kill, so we lazed around a bit and did a walk about at their main street. Did some windowshopping at The Store and mum tried her luck at the local 4D branch. The weather was stifling, so we stopped at the nearby food court for shaved ice and kuih-muih. For some reason, kuih stalls can be found all over the place. Some obsession. Had a fantastic kuih koci. Back at the room, I watched an old wuxia movie that I suspect "The Sword of Many Loves" got inspiration from. At 5:00pm, we left for Bukit Mertajam to attend the evening mass.


It was only the second day of the feast, so the famous crowds were absent. But the carnival-like atmosphere was already taking shape with all the stalls and buses. Plenty of people were making petitions and mass offerings at the parish office. The main church was very large with a layered roof not unlike the famous Sydney Opera House. As per conventional design, it's shaped like a cross with the difference that parishioner's could also sit BEHIND the altar. The first time I celebrated mass with the celebrant's back towards me. Guess that how it feels pre-Vatican II. The guest speaker from Sacred Heart Kuala Lumpur gave an interesting homily about the challenges of the youth. Managed to take a look at the St. Anne Museum where all the offerings from the faithful are kept-- anything ranging from golden rosaries, plaques, cards, art to silver and gold etchings of body parts (some kind of traditional Indian thanksgiving token?).


During the bus ride back to the hotel, I watched "Just Follow Law", a Jack Neo production about government red tape. Quite nice, but I didn't get to catch the ending. Back at the hotel, some idiotic hashers were having some kind of pow-wow OUTSIDE their rooms. With the thin walls, it was really annoying, so SK made an irate call to the security to shoo them off. Had to wake up at 6:30am to go to Maxwell Hill the next day!!!

Deep Throat

173-Le cri
Swiped from gillespinault.
Published this post for my non-Facebook readers. And if you've read the gist in Facebook, think of this as the detailed account. At dinner some weeks ago, Mum served fried Ma Yau / Kurau. For those of you who know, that fish does not have many bones. Most of the bones are big and are easy to pick out. Maybe I wasn't paying attention (told you not to read the papers during dinner!) or I was just downright careless, I swallowed a bone and it was stuck at my throat. There was no more rice to force it down with. Ugh. The feeling was intermittent, so I guess that bone was stuck at an angle. Nothing seemed to be able to dislodge it. Luckily, I was able to sleep that night.

The next morning, it was still there. That just goes to show that there is no Fish Bone Fairy who comes to dislodge fish bones in your throat and leave an iPhone under your pillow. I went to the clinic opposite my office. As I was waiting there, loads and loads of people with fever, coughs and colds walked in and out. I hid at a corner with the least traffic. When my turn came, I told my predicament to an elderly female doctor in a saree. She was quite surprised:

Dr.: So early eat fish arrr?

Moi: (kenot meh?!) Yesterday. Dinner.

Dr.: OK, I need you to relax....

She got out her crocodile forceps (looked like bent scissors with teeth), held my forehead and instructed the nurse to position the torchlight. At first, she couldn't locate it. She brought out a tongue depressor. And when she saw it, she exclaimed that it was quite deep and if her attempts failed, I would have to make a trip to the ENT. She tried going in deep twice. She said she was gonna make a final try. I completely relaxed and mustered all I learned from my blowjob experiences. :P. It paid off! When she pulled out the forceps, out came the bone-- an inch long. :S. She gave me some thymol to gargle and charged me MYR34.

Nurse: Apa ikan you makan?

Moi: Ehhhhhh. You tahu "Ma Yau" ke? Kepala dia macam torpedo?!

Nurse: Hmmm. Terubok ke? (BUKAN LA!) Tak banyak tulang tu...

And back to work I went.... Thank you doc! (No MC, :()

Wednesday, July 29, 2009

Colleagues Say The Darndest Things

During lunch the other day, my Burmese colleague said some things that made me choke on my rice:

Colleague: I used to dislike {replace this with a religion} and gays.

Moi: (looking around nervously) Shhhsshhhs! Not so loud!

Colleague: Now, I begin to accept the existence of gays. They're part of society. It is acknowledged in Buddhism. But lesbians get no mention.

Moi: .......

During tea time, the same colleague reached another milestone:

Colleague: Brokeback Mountain is not a gay movie!

Moi: Then what is it?

Colleague: It's the story about love between two men.

Moi: (nearly choked on my roti telur) Are you OK?

Tuesday, July 28, 2009

LRT Celebrities: Facial on the Go And Jimmy White

Swiped from williamnyk.
Remember my warning about not being cute and putting the LRT ticket into your mouth? For you nay-sayers and unbelievers, here's photographic evidence! The guy you see here was using the LRT ticket to scrape whiteheads from his face!!! Gross!!! For the whole journey from Masjid Jamek to Seri Petaling he worked at it. Starting at his nose, he worked his way towards his cheeks. Every time he scraped, he would wipe off the greasy residue from the ticket. Sometimes, he would scrape extra hard, and I would know that he had hit the motherlode. Next time, when you taste some sebum-y goodness off your LRT ticket, you know what it is.

The other guy is some student with the British Council. Wore white from head to toe. If he had white dreadlocks on his head, I would have thought him the Merovingian's bodyguards from "The Matrix: Reloaded". With a black satin tie, a lackey with the mafia. An albino waiter? But I'm just being mean as certain school uniforms are like that. :P.

Singapore Siesta V: Mona My Lisa

Note: I have no more photos for this post as more than 100 of my photos were corrupted due to a CF card failure. *sob sob*

KH was busy the whole week, but he managed to get off on Friday. We had breakfast of fried egg (was supposed to be half-boiled, but my dear KH is a bit hopeless in the kitchen, that's why he needs me, lol) with banana-walnut toast. Weird combination, right? Post-breakfast, we went on to doing some cardio on HJ's expensive mattress. Hehe. Finishing up, we freshened ourselves up and went to the Singapore Science Centre. We were there for the Da Vinci: The Genius exhibition. The highlight of it was the 240-million pixel, multi-spectral copy of The Mona Lisa. Could see it in it's original colours and "in the nude". If one goes to The Louvre, you'll only be able see it from afar, behind bullet-proof glass. Other than that, they showcased his genius for mechanics, biology, art and the love of men. :P. Such a multi-talented queer! For the first time, I watched an IMAX movie too-- "Sea Monsters: A Prehistoric Adventure". Was quite nice. Finding Nemo meets Jurassic Park. Lunch was at a food court in Jurong East.

At home, I finished up packing for my 7:00pm flight. With the remaining time, KH "finished" where we left off in the morning. Just as we got on the cab to head to Changi, JJ called to say that my flight had been delayed till 12:00am. :S. It was an ungodly hour to have SK pick me up, so I changed my ticket to the first morning flight the next day. Dinner was at the Crystal Jade at T3. An awkward experience there. The food portion was small and there was a quality issue regarding their fish dish. JJ said it was inedible, but KH found it OK. The waiter explained that fish was fresh, except that it had a "soil" smell to it. Anyway, JJ left a fuming feedback for them. Did some walking around before heading home. A delay meant an extra night for me to spend with KH. It was unexpected, but very much welcome! Woke up at 5:00am the next morning to catch my flight. Breakfast was a lousy toasted bun and coffee. It was nice of JJ to also wake up at that ungodly hour to send me off. Singapura..., I will be back!

Sunday, July 26, 2009

Singapore Siesta IV: Just Peachy!

Spermy Jelly
Swiped from williamnyk.
Thursday was JJ's official day off. So sweet of him to take annual leave to accompany me. Hehe. In the morning, we swam a little as the sun was too hot. Then we just lounged a while on the deck chairs beneath the parasol to cool off. Once again, no cuties. :(. Our next appointment was at Peach Garden, a restaurant on the 33th floor of OCBC Centre. It has a great view of the CBD. Had dim sum with KH and Eskay. The last time I met Eskay at Mont Calzone, I was kinda zombified and he was sitting a bit far off, so we couldn't really interact. This time round, things were much better and we got to talk more. The food was great and even greater was the fact that JJ picked up the tab. Hehe. I didn't take pics of the food (I should have!), with the exception of the black glutinous rice dessert-- double-boiled in a young coconut and served with coconut ice cream and topped with spermy jelly.

SG 33

Went to an adult shop after lunch to buy lube for a friend. An obscene price of SGD41 for 270ml. Ever hear of ID? In view of my mum's recent bone spur problem, we went hunting for a memory pillow. The doctor recommended it as it provides more support, hence alleviating any neck stiffness due to sleep. The salespeople were all very helpful and they were more interested to get my mum in to try the pillow rather than sell one. LOL. Too expensive in Singapore, so we went home empty-handed. The brand my bro is currently using is Tempur and costs a whopping SGD300. :S. I settled for an Akemi in KL for less than MYR80.
Also did some window-shopping at Paragon, Orchard Central and Iluma, but all were mostly too atas. Having forgotten to charge my batteries the night before, I had replace them at Orchard Central. I bought the wrong batteries, and they died after taking two shops. Had to revisit the pharmacy to get proper alkaline batteries. I noticed that the Guardian there didn't sell condoms. Weird hor?

POD was having an exhibition at his art gallery, so we decided to have an early dinner and join him for supper later. So, JJ brought me to Chinatown Point. A shop nearby served fantastic wantan noodles. So springy! After that, we visited SportsmenAsia. Apparently, they are doing a pre-renovation sale, but I would still prefer to buy from eBay. To rest our legs, we made a stop at KTZ for some dessert. I ordered egg-drop water chestnut. Was quite surprised that the egg was so yellow. Wonder if they put colouring! The function going on was actually a photography exhibition of day-to-day life in India. Quite nice. And most importantly, wine was served. KH, JJ, POD, Nic and I bummed upstairs until the last guests left.

Dinner was at a food court in Tanjung Pagar. Ordered steamed patin, kungpao frogs, pork ribs and vegetables. The chef and his staff "grumbled" that we didn't finish the best part of the fish, so I went on and gobbled up all the gelatinous parts of the fish. :P. It was long day, so we all quickly headed home after dinner.

Saturday, July 25, 2009

Guess! Guess! Guess!

I interrupt my little Singapore Siesta with this stupid guessing game. The machine looks diabolical, no? A crude washing machine? A food processor? Some new sex toy? Take a wild guess. No prizes, but you'll earn the title Domestic Goddess. Silakan!

Friday, July 24, 2009

Singapore Siesta III: Stay-At-Home Hubby

Swiped from bomza.
No plans for the day, so I just merempat at home. And I had morning "exercise", so I kinda slept in a bit. Had a simple breakfast and I later went out to tapau mixed rice at the club house. I was supposed to bring my own tupperware (those guys are so GREEN), but I forgot... so I'm guilty of using a styrofoam container. :P. The food was satisftying and the uncle was generous. Post-lunch, I did the ever-important IRONING. Turns out that my dear KH left the most challenging work shirts and pants for me. The material was like kiam chai and even spraying water and using the highest heat setting couldn't quite tame them. Luckily JJ didn't have any clothes for me to iron. After finishing my quota for the trip, I watched some episodes of Bleach. Then I went swimming before my dinner appointment with my brother. No cuties. :(

Just as I wanted to go out, I found that my Starhub Prepaid had died. Couldn't make any calls. Shit. KH had already prepared a reload card for me, but I couldn't reload it as the reload number is NOT FREE and is not accessible via land line. And they don't support star codes like in Malaysia. So I called them at their help line. Turns out that I need to give the operator the number and they'll reload for me. Masyallah.

I met my brother at Bugis. Dinner was at a small al fresco restaurant at the corner of Middle and Bencoolen. Cheap prices for good food. I had Jalapeno Shrimp Pasta and my brother had the duck breast with read wine sauce. Had wine too. No pictures of the food as my brother will roll his eyes if I whip out my camera. I was waiting for KH to finish his play, so my brother took me for coffee at a nearby TCC. Had a nice view of Iluma and it's pulsating nodes. I ordered the Rose Juliet and talked more with my brother. Discussed my mum's health, travel plans, H1N1, work, SK's health and other trivial stuff. The play was running late so we only left past 11pm. Was pissed that I wasn't updated properly about the delay, but KH did very well to appease me. Can I ever stay angry at that face?

Thursday, July 23, 2009

Singapore Siesta II: JJ Ponteng!

Whenever I sleep over at KH's place, there's always a routine that we follow. Before snoozing, we always cuddle. And in the middle of the night, KH often wakes up to sip some water. I would still be half asleep and KH would be at the bedside, urging the cup to my lips. Back to sleep again. In the mornings, he would rouse me from my slumber with a kiss (and more :P). Then I would stumble groggily out to the toilet and find JJ already out to work. On that Tuesday morning, I found JJ's bedroom door still closed... meaning he ponteng! After I had my breakfast of banana-walnut toast and sent KH off to work with a kiss, JJ ambled out looking all worn out. He had another rough night getting to sleep. Bad for him, but good for me-- I have somebody to teman me for the day!

We left the house to meet KH, Mrs. H and Mdm. E (KH's fag hag's from work) at Paya Lebar. Lunch was at the food court. We had Ashton's-- cheap and great Western fare. Mrs. H joined us first and Mdm. E came later cause she was tied up with work. Nearby colleagues kept staring at us because they think that I'm Mdm. E's boyfriend. Wu liao-ness kicked in and we both tried to create a scandal by doing some pretending. Reminds me of my outings with Mel in Bangsar. Post-lunch was at Coffee and Toast. They use quality eggs when making soft-boiled eggs. So large and fragrant!

Later, HJ and I went to Orchard for a short round of shopping. The objective was very clear-- Birkenstock and Crumpler. The Birkenstock place at Wheelock Place had a large collection, but the price wasn't to SK's liking. So that was that. The next task was easier-- buying a Crumpler sling bag for JM. Can you imagine that even the bloody should protector costs SGD25, whereas the bag was only SGD98? Pengz. Went home soon after that as JJ needed to get some rest. Managed to catch the fancy new mall-- The Ion. It's not open yet, but according to my brother, the building is so bright at at night that it blinds traffic and causes light pollution.

At night, KH, JJ, Mrs. H and I sang KTV at K-Box, Suntec City. Horrible KTV system. If you thought Neway was lousy, this is even worse. No charges for the room, but you have to buy overpriced snacks and drinks (SGD10 for chinese tea anyone?). We smuggled in our own food. We sang for about 3 hours of random stuff, from Lady Gaga to Katie Perry to Cindy Lauper to Abba to MJ to Teresa Teng. It was a blast. My voice was a bit hoarse after that, but could still do a little bit more moaning before bed... :P

Wednesday, July 22, 2009


A couple of Sundays back, SK and I unwittingly ended up at a health fair organized by those dodgy clinic cum health care consultancies. Loads of people were there and there was some talk going on with lots of food outside. As I had to wait for my mum and her friends to arrive, we decided to go in and register ourselves. After walking past the crowds and posters of diseased female nether regions, we arrived at the registration counter. The woman in the lab coat passed SK a form to fill without hardly looking up. I was standing at ther side when the woman suddenly asked:

"Your son ah?"

I laughed out loud!!!

"Err, your boyfriend ah?"

I told her to speak no more. SK was fuming and did not even acknowledge she ever spoke. Hehe. Looks like I have a new mummy!

Tuesday, July 21, 2009

Singapore Siesta I: Cooking Up A Storm

Being the "slut" (according to my son DanielH and ThompsonBoy), I was in Singapore for another Ironing trip. Once again, I flew via JetStar (compliments of KH) and arrived in Changi at around 5:00pm. POD was there to greet me as the rest were working. In the cab:

POD: You're cooking tonight, right?

Moi: What?! I had the impression that YOU were cooking. Thought that I was playing a secondary role.

POD: Errr.... KH told me YOU were cooking leh.

Moi: I think KH pulled a fast one on us.

So ganas, just arrived already immediately set me up to work in the kitchen. To cook for 6! Sniff. Sniff. Upon arrival at JJ's place, I put down my luggage and immediately brought POD to the nearby NTUC Fairprice at Eastpoint Mall for some grocery shopping. The menu was curry chicken, stir-fried vegetables and sweet and sour fish. There is an interesting story about the fish too:

POD: Wei, JJ asked to cook his fish. He bought it since the 1st of May.

Moi: Emmm, OK la. (May didn't register in my mind, I thought July!!!)

POD: Wei. May wor.

Moi: (It dawns on me...) HAR. Can still eat or not?!

That's why we decided om sweet and sour, to mask any bau hanyir. Wanted to get chillies, but everything was sold in gigantic packets. Contemplated shoplifting one chilly or buying a single piece of chilly YTF, but ended up using capsicum instead. The fish was frozen solid. We left it out to thaw before we went out to buy stuff, but it definitely wasn't enough! We ended up thawing it in the microwave thrice and by the time we were done, I think it was half-cooked.

POD was the Iron Chef and I was the kitchen helper from the culinary institute. He cooked, while I peeled potatoes, cleaned the vegetables and stuff. JJ fried the fish. Everything turned out well, except that the taters in the curry chicken disintegrated, turning into a dhal-like consistency. Anyway, POD, Nic, Simon, JJ, KH and I finished all the food. Dinner was served with wine, ocha and chrysanthemum tea. Post-dinner entertainment was a fashion show by Simon and several Q&A's regarding past relationships and skanky stuff. Everyone had a blast. We were giggling like schoolgirls. After all the guests left, we cleaned up the place. Found that JJ's sink had a clog due to the food debris no doubt, so had to do some mopping as well. :(. After everything was settled, I got down to business with KH.....

P.S.: Like the "tattoo" I made for KH?

Sunday, July 19, 2009

Spur of the Moment

x-ray image
Swiped from wu.peng.
Since before my Melbourne trip, mum had been complaining about a stiffness in her neck. Kinda brushed it off as salah bantal, but when it didn't go away for 2 months, mum got a bit worried. Chiropractors and sinseh's failed to improve the condition. And so, we ended up at Tung Shin to see an orthopaedic surgeon, Dr. Low. Upon arrival at the hospital, our temperature was taken and a sticker was given to mark us as potentially H1N1-free. Amazingly, his clinic opens at 9:00am and he's actually there! After consultation and an X-ray, he declared that my mum has bone spurs at her fourth and fifth cervical vertebrae. They look like little protrusions from the edge of the bone. He prescibed some NSAIDs, painkillers and glucosamine and also encouraged her to do exercises to loosen her neck muscles. Mum's feeling better now and she does not touch her neck so often anymore. Hope it improves more!

Friday, July 17, 2009

The Lesser of Two Evils

Celcom Broadband
Swiped from Girllyen.
When I see newspaper ads that proclaim TM the winner of "Best Internet Service Provider" awards and what not, I let out a bitter laugh. Meaningless as they are a monopoly. From all the problems that my sister and SK complain about and the multitudes of irate letters I see in The Star, it takes no genius to conclude that Streamyx is crap. Celcom being the subsidiary is also naturally crappy. I e-mailed them about Celcom Broadband coverage in my area and I must say that their customer service is impeccable. It took their automated system 11 minutes to reply my e-mail, promising a reply soon. After a week (soon hor?), they replied and asked me to furnish them MORE details although I already gave them my street address. And in the e-mail they even provided me with an alternative to check SMS. Text "BROADBAND HERE" kononnya. The number was rejected by DiGi. It took them another 2 weeks later to call me with the GOOD NEWS that my area has VERY GOOD COVERAGE. Kudos to their network team.

I made a similar inquiry through Izzi's website. They promised to come back to me in 3-5 working days. I was pleasantly surprised when they called me after a few hours (it was a Sunday!) and tried to arrange a live demo at my place. Their staff were very courteous and did not mind arranging things after working hours. Although my appointment did not materialize due to their agent's schedule change, the guy never-the-less went to my front door during the day to try it out and reported to me immediately that there was no signal. So much for that.

End of the day, I took a gamble with Celcom. David was kind enough to borrow me his U Mobile modem to tried out the coverage at my place. If it was bad, I would have burned MYR98. However, it was decent and I decided to continue with the subscription and buy my own modem. I made some inquiries at Blue Cube and those bloodsuckers quoted me MYR499 for a Vodaphone modem. I said, "Screw you, I'm getting a Huawei at the TM Agent". That cost me only MYR310. I have not looked back since then, and am now an active member of cyberspace. Hopefully Celcom Broadband will be gwai-gwai and give me good service. Butttttttt...... life is never a bed of roses. I found that the E160E modem I'm using causes the Blue Screen of Death on my laptop. Ugh. I'm still waiting for a reply from their tech support.

Anyway, I'm once again a regular face in cyberspace. See ya!

Wednesday, July 15, 2009


When I turned 1 (some 28 years ago), my mum cooked up a storm and invited the neighbours. I had a birthday cake in the shape of the numeral "1"! Back then, THAT was a big deal. Well, my nephew Cyan turned 1 lately and his parents threw him a party with about fifty guests. Got the caterers to handle everything. The food was quite good and there was even a satay stall. Being my sister's favourite, the birthday cake turned out to be a brownie from Secret Recipe. Each slice was completed with a giant scoop of vanilla ice cream. Sinful. An interesting part of the festivities included a ritual of "choices". Several items were put in a tray in front of him, and he was allowed to grab the stuff that caught his eye.
  1. Chicken drumstick (aku suka makan?)
  2. Ruler (future engineer?)
  3. Book (scholar?)
  4. Pencil (writer?)
  5. Rubber stamp (official?)
  6. Calculator (accountant?)
  7. Credit Card (businessman?)

FYI, the first thing Cyan grabbed was the book. From afar, he smiled and crawled over and grabbed it without noticing the rest. The rubber stamp was his second choice. I think I would've grabbed a porn DVD. Oh well...

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

Prince of Pork

Note: A caveat for my Muslim readers-- Kerbau Pendek ahead.

There's this butcher at the Taman United wet market who is super nice to his female helper. Even with the sleep not yet rub off from your eyes, just a slight taste of their conversation can immediately wake you up and set your bulu roma to attention:

PoP: Ming, Ah Ming. Help me collect MYR30 from the auntie. Emmmmmmm koi....

PoP: Ming, Ah Ming. Please help me keep 2 kidneys for the auntie. Emmmmm koi....

Auntie: (rolls her eyes) Aiyoh! Suffix, postfix also em koi, em koi, em koi. Beh tahan....

I think after many complaints and comments from his customers, he has stopped doing it of late. Market courtship or gentlemanly conduct? Whatever the case, it's a pity that we let others dictate how we want to show our affection le... hehe

Monday, July 13, 2009

Meeting Halfway: That Kind of Place

Swiped from williamnyk.
Note: A little something that happened ages ago... Enjoy!

Usually, I would go to Singapore (once in a while) or KH would travel back home to KL (the ommon case) and we would have our reunion. This time round, we took another approach-- meeting somewhere in the middle. POD had planned a JJCM (eat, eat, eat) trip to Melaka, so we met there over the weekend. SK and I drove down from KL, while POD, Nic, JJ and KH rented a car from JB. Initially, we had planned to meet at noon, but due to some unexpected delays with the car rental agency (Avis sucks), SK and I suddenly had 3 hours to burn in Melaka. At first, we spent some time walking around Melaka Mall. Horrible. Luckily, she managed to get hold of an old friend from her uni days (the chap's nick is Mosquito!) and he took us for lunch in town. Dirt cheap and delicious-- char siew, roast pork, scrambled eggs, pickled vegetables and beancurd only came to MYR12, inclusive of drinks. Mind-boggling. After lunch, he brought us to Tan Kim Hock. The shop is still as tacky as ever but the pineapple tarts were great. On our way back to collect our car, Bunny was amazing enough to have caught sight of me in the backseat of Mosquito's MyVi while he was drinking soya bean in a shop. Talk about uncanny.

Met up with Bunny, Savante and Leggy for chicken rice balls soon after we collected our car. Mosquito guided us there and was even nice enough to give us a pack of parking tickets to use. The town council charges for parking 365 days a year, up till 9:00pm! And after the official hours, budak jaga kereta reign in the streets. There's no escape. The shop was called Chuang Huang, somewhere near the Dragon Deluxe Restaurant. A whole bunch of rice balls, half a chicken (plus an extra portion) and drinks only cost us MYR23! Bunny wanted to meet his grandparents, so we tagged along. His mother was quite amused by our choice of hotel:


Mama Bunny: Where are you guys spending the night?

Me: Fenix Inn.

Mama Bunny: Where is that?

Savante: (tries to explain)

Mama Bunny: Ooooooooooohhhh. THAT kind of place.

Next we met up with the group from the South at Fenix Inn to check in. Had cendol at a nearby shop after all that was settled. Believe it or not, immediately after that, we went for pork satay at Ming's Satay Hut.

Us: 20 sticks pork. 20 sticks liver.

Waitress: Liver? LIVER? L.I.V.E.R.? You want liver?!

Us: Er, yes?


Turns out the liver was better than the meat. Hehe. Before dinner, we did the tourist-y stuff at A Famosa, St. Paul's Church and The Stadhuyst. Savante was full of little nuggets of information. The perfect tour guide. If you wanna know which guy ran off to avoid ah long, which place is cruisy and which restaurant is haunted, do check with him. Dinner was supposed to be satay celup at Capitol Satay, but the queue was too long, so the group split. I joined the rest for peranakan food at Family Heritage Restaurant. Savante drove us as Bunny was starting to get zombified since he "forgot" to sleep the night before. A speed demon behind the wheel, seemingly not hesitant to squish motorists who get in his way. With his head lolling from side to side, Bunnt slept through the whole journey. We ordered teochew style steamed kurau, otak-otak, kam heong prawns, portugese stye okra, cincalok omelette, homemade beancurd, vegetable curry and chicken rendang. Luckily the last dish didn't come as we had overdone it.

The rest of the gang had finished their meal too, so we met them up again at Jonker Street. Did some shopping at Sam Shu Gung. Well-designed packaging makes a world of difference. Very different from the usual tacky brands and the taste and price weren't that far compromised. Hunted for some egg tarts and handmade noodles, then we adjourned to Coconut Cafe for pizza and drinks since the lesbian bar wasn't open for business. Back at the hotel, KH and I had our much anticipated "coupling". Several times that night, we floated between sleep and teasing the hell out of each other before grand finale the next morning. Bliss! Before checking out, we had breakfast at Hing Loong for some great Taiwan noodles and did some shopping at the nearby Dataran Pahlawan. SK and KH even had time for a foot massage!

Lunch was chicken rice balls again. This time at Chung Yuan, Jonker. The queue was long and the meal was average la. We quickly finished up and went for cendol again at eMelaka. One for the road. Another horrible crowd and so we ended up eating while standing. A small respite from the heat. As we left, the police were just coming in to issue summonses, so we were quite lucky. The highway was a bit jammed, but SK and I made it back in time for Pentecost Sunday Mass. Dinner was at Deli Sushi, Kuchai Entrepeneurs Park. Salmon fish head noodles. So-so. This concludes my food diary for the weekend....

Thursday, July 09, 2009

Jap @ 6

Dorayaki Boy
Swiped from williamnyk.
Overheard in Kampachi, The Pavilion:

Woman: I'll have the Kakiage Don set.

Waiter: Very good, miss.

(after 15 minutes)

Waiter: Here's your Kakiage Don.

Woman: (looking hither and thither) Where's the rice?

Waiter: (pointing towards the bowl) ...... under the Kakiage .....

The food at Kampachi (of Equatorial Hotel) is quite good, but I must say that the waitresses they employ could have been a little less Chinese-restaurant-y. Prices are quite fair at about MYR40 and above for dinner sets. The Chirashi Don that I ordered was nice, with quality fish and seaweed. The hojicha is good too. Give it a try.

Wednesday, July 08, 2009

Melbourne Menagerie VIII: Goodbye, Mate

Once again, we checked out and loaded everything into the Tarrago. Breakfast was eggs benedict with hollondaise sauce at a nearby diner. We backtracked to the Twelve Apostles again as my bro-in-law wanted to pictures of it in better lighting conditions. After that, we stopped at London Bridge. Another product of erosion from the waves. It looks nothing like London Bridge of course, unless you down a couple of psychotropic pills. It was a nice sight anyway. Next was The Arch. It was fun looking at how the strong waves pushed a big hole into the limestone. Another breathtaking sight. Loch Ard Gorge was last on our list. It was the site of a famous shipwreck were only 2 people survived. From the way things were, it was easy to imagine how the ships were downed by the cliffs and boulders in the area.


We had to rush back to Melbourne to take our flight, so we bid the Great Ocean Road farewell and took the shorter inland road back via Colac. Colac's quite a big town and we stopped there for lunch. At Gravity Cafe, I ordered a risotto and a chai latte (spice overdose!). Sis ordered a Hummingbird to go. The Hummingbird is actually a cake and the reason why its called that is because its so bloody sweet with apricots and coconut. By the time we arrived at Geelong, it was rush hour traffic and we had quite a snarl to Melbourne. We killed time at Lygon Street. Sat at Koko Black and tried their heavenly hot chocolate and walnut brownie. I can imagine swimming in that chocolate.


Dinner was at Papa Gino's again. Hehe. This time, we ordered the seafood marinara pizza, fried scallops and fettucini saltati. As usual, mum and I ordered wine. I enjoyed the riesling. And this time, I remembered to order the tiramisu. Yummy. My bro-in-law visited Gelatisimo again and ordered one mango sorbet for the road. We arrived at the airport and returned the car with time to spare. A cute guy sat at the same row as me and The Nutter would be pleased to know that he looked a bit like Stanley Huang. Lol. It was an enjoyable trip, and as usual, all good things must come to an end. I had hoped that my mum and sis would get along, but it still ended with a sour note. Somethings you can't change. Legendary stubbornness runs in the family. Cheerio!


P.S.: Random cuteness!


Tuesday, July 07, 2009

Melbourne Menagerie VII: Everyday Is A Winding Road

First thing in the morning, we checked out of our apartment and lugged everything into the Tarrago. The GPS was set to Torquay and "avoid toll roads" and we were on our way. Breakfast was at Anglesea, where the sea supposedly meets the bush. Had breakfast of a quiche lorraine, apple strudel and a heavenly chocolate mousse for mum's birthday. I had a hard time trying to communicate with the girl at the bakery:

Me: Can you get me a fork?

Girl: What?

Me: A fork.

Girl: A what?

Me: F-O-R-K.

Girl: Oh, a foRRk.


Must have been that my Klingon had a Malaysian accent. Mum did some shopping at the local Salvation Army Thrift Shop, can you believe it? From there on, we had hit the Great Ocean Road, a super-winding, scenic road that takes you real close to the South Australian coastline. One lane up. One lane down. With overtaking bays that allow for slower vehicles to turn in as to give way. They double as lookout points too. Fantastic views of the limestone cliffs and the roaring sea. At Torquay, the home of most of the surfing brands (no time for shopping!), we stopped a while to photograph the wind-swept trees. They really grow at an acute angle. So bonsai. At Lorne, we took another gelato stop at Lick and Sip. Award-winning flavours, but I only liked their lemon cheesecake. Time was running short, we just made a quick stop at Erskine Falls. According to the brochure, "if you're physically fit, you may consider taking the 200 steps down to the Lower Erskine Falls Lookout". I scoffed at that. I regretted it. For one thing, the waterfall was quite dry. And secondly, the climb back up at that altitude and in the cold air was stifling. Now I know why athletes wanna do training in the highlands.


The road between Apollo Bay and Port Campbell was the worst, bagai ular kena palu. Firstly, my nephew threw up, followed by my sis. Everyone had konked out during the journey, so I put my foot to the pedal. I made it to The Twelve Apostles in time. The sun had not begun to set yet. Really beautiful, carved out of the cliff after millions of years of erosion. But there's only 8 now I think. The rest had collapsed. With the diminishing light and spray from surf, it was quite a sight to behold. We spent the night at Park View Motel, a nice homey place with electric blankets and a space heater. We really needed those as it was REALLY cold at night. Dinner was at a nearby Italian restaurant called Nico's. Turns out that the owner is a local mud wrestling champ too. Ordered a Sicilian pizza and boy, were those anchovies salty! The linguini was disappointing too. Back at the motel, mum and I downed half a bottle of the pinot to keep warm....


P.S.: As per Beng2's request, I have given a thought to enlarging the photos! How? How?

Monday, July 06, 2009

Melbourne Menagerie VI: Hertz's NeverLost & The Penguin Parade

Early in the morning, bro-in-law and I took a brisk morning walk to Franklin Street to collect our Toyota Tarrago (that's Estima to us) from the people at Hertz. After they explained everything to us, we drove back to Flinders Lane to pick up the rest. The drive out to Phillip Island was quite pleasant in the large vehicle since my little nephew needed so much ka chang. And the GPS made things a lot easier and harder at the same time.

Heather/Susan: Bear left! Bear right! Make a sharp left turn! Traffic control! You have reached your destination

It was quite a challenge referring to the GPS, looking out for traffic and pedestrians and watching your speed. And so, I took on the job as navigator. Such a redundant job hor? Hehe. We arrived in about less than 2 hours with a short breakfast stop at a diner in Pelican Bay. The island is quite picturesque with Windows XP default wallpaper-like scenery. Sheep. Cows. Vineyards. The works. The photos that I took cannot begin to express what my eyes saw. On the island, our first stop was at the Panny's Chocolate Factory. Had to pay to see the chocolate sculptures, so we decided to give it a miss. Next was the Purple Hen Winery. The last of the grapes had been picked after Easter so all was left was the yellowing leaves. According to the staff, they would prune away the branches and by October, new grapes would be out again. After tasting their cabernet, merlot and chardonnay, I decided on a bottle of their 2007 Pinot Noir. Wine is so cheap in Australia....


Not satisfied with the koalas he saw at Healesville, my bro-in-law brought us to the Koala Conservation Centre. All in all, there were supposed to be 35 of 'em, but we saw only 8 (inclusive of the 2 giant fake ones at the entrance). Another disappointing wildlife escapade. Since we still had time to burn before the famous Penguin Parade, we took a detour to Pyramid Rock. It's just what its name implies--- a rock shaped like a pyramid. The cliffs around it were much more impressive. Loved it. The Penguin Parade started about 6:30pm. At the beach, we got to observe hundreds of cute little penguins coming in from the sea. They would waddle inland to their burrows. You know what? Penguins sound like gremlins. Unfortunately, photography and videography were not allowed, not that my Canon A95 would have managed any decent photos in the dark anyway.

The rangers at the Penguin Centre recommended us to have dinner at the nearby Taylor's Waterfront Restaurant. Fantastic service, but just slightly above average seafood. We ordered the lobster ravioli with lobster bisque (yumm!), salmon steak and a basket of fried seafood. After that, I drove back to Melbourne. Overnight parking rates in Melbourne are cutthroat in the CBD area, costing up to AUD50. All of us were tired, and we needed to conserve our energy for an even longer trip the next day-- The Great Ocean Road!


P.S.: Anything catch your eye in last collage? Spot 'em!

Friday, July 03, 2009


Swiped from Tsuki Aoi.
Note: A little breather from my Melbourne series. Wanted to post this since my last Singpore trip!

When I copied the anime "Gravitation" from KH, he merely told me that it was about a music band. A simple and mundane as an anime about baking bread, playing football or catching beetles (I'm sure it exists). Me being me, I finished the porn first before moving on to it. The squeeze of boredom. But after watching the first episode, I was pleasantly surprised! "Gravitation" turns out to be a "boys' love" anime! Quite the classic recipe of annoying, clingy brat falls for the brooding and handsome older guy. Shuichi is the lead singer of "Bad Luck" and he falls in love with a famous romance novelist, Yuki. Shuichi is portrayed as confused and Yuki carries enough emotional baggage to fill an Airbus. Most of the early episodes end with Yuki and Shuichi in some kind of "action". Throw in some music videos here and there, some cute antics and drama, you've got yourself a fairly-entertaining anime.

Thursday, July 02, 2009

Melbourne Menagerie V: St. Patrick & St. Kilda Sitting In A Tree...

On Sunday, mum and I took a gamble and went out to St. Patrick's Church hoping to be on time for mass. We hopped on the tram and in no time reached the Mother Church of the Melbourne Archdiocese. Turns out that we were in time. The cathedral was quite a sight. Not as ornate as St. Paul's, but it has its appeal. Not many parishioners were there as expected and around half of those celebrating the eucharist were tourists. After mass, we took pictures inside the church but we later found out that it was not allowed! Adoi! But we had more fun cam-whoring outside anyway. :P. At the side, there's a statue of Mother Mary holding aloft a crown of thorns (interesting to note that earlier in the morning, I spied a stick-on grafitti of the Virgin Mary baring her boobs). And in Her sleeve, a JVC camcorder was slotted in! I don't know if that's vandalism, art or a security camera. Out of the blue, more than 20 altar boys suddenly materialised from the annexxe (some cute!). Turns out that the Bishop was gonna celebrate mass. Such an entourage in full regalia, candles and censer. Mum and I decided to walk back to the apartment, taking in the sights and camwhoring at the same time. Managed to catch the Parliament House, City Museum, The Treasury, and some of the quaint streets along the way.


On the other hand, sis and my bro-in-law were at QVM again to buy fruits (my bro-in-law was popping strawberries like M&Ms) and settle the car rental for our drive out on Monday. Around lunch, we headed out to St. Kilda Beach. It was the hottest day of the whole trip with us shedding our extra layers of clothes. The sun was glaring. The sky was clear. And the sea was SO, SO blue. Being a Sunday, the Maker's Market was also in full swing with lots of arts and crafts on sale-- from glassware and soaps to jewellery and silverware. Mostly of good workmanship and thus prices were not low. The ang mohs were busy soaking up the sun, lying on the grass and literally spreading their legs-- saw one guy was in only his high-cut running shorts and another girl in a mini skirt with the open end facing traffic. :S. Gives new meaning to the phrase "your coffeeshop is open". Luna Park was nearby, but we didn't enter.


Back in town, mum and I went to the National Gallery of Victory. At the European art section, we were welcomed by a painting of Lady Borgia. Always wondered who Savante was referring to. Out of the 4 storeys of paintings, we only managed 25%. No time to ooh-ahh at every exhibit. But it was very nice. Too bad we went in too close to the closing time. Bought some Lord of the Fries chips with traditional Autralian ketchup. Delicious! Dinner was at the Greek quarter. Simply chose the most bustling of restaurants-- Stalactites Restaurant. Ordered the mixed dip with pita bread, mixed giros and mixed grill. Beautifully prepared meat. Succulent. Had Greek coffee served in a super-dainty cup. One pull would empty it, reaching the dregs at the bottom. Definitely not Ipoh white coffee, but it's OK. Tomorrow, Phillip Island!