Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Down Under

I'll be frolicking with kangaroos, koalas, wombats, emus and penguins for a week starting Wednesday. See ya!


Sunday, April 26, 2009

Ten Beers

Kusanagi of SMAP fame said it best,

"There is nothing wrong with being naked."

Yes, there's nothing wrong. Now for the rest of the members to make
the same declaration. ;)


Friday, April 24, 2009

The Family Jewels Need No Jewels!

Over a cup of Teh C (yes, at the Siew Keong place), my Burmese colleague out of the blue regaled me about tales of penile enhancement, all for the sake of female satisfaction, eh-hem. The things he described really caused me to scrunch up my face, even worse than staring down at a cockroach leg in one's cup. Heh. D-I-Y projects with little glass beads and a razor with a smidgen of antibiotic cream for a bumpier ride with the ladies (gotta ask SK what she thinks of this). And heaven forbid sewing knots of horsehair into the penile skin to keep the women coming back for more and more. Ghastly! If it was me, I'd rather stick to a Swarovski-encrusted dildo than an accessorized cock!

Have a nice weekend, folks! I on the other hand, have to work! :(

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Expect. Ask. Not Get It.

It's a small thing really. But it makes me happy. I used to just
expect it. And naturally was disappointed. Hence I opened my mouth,
made my expectations known. It was acknowledged. I was happy for a
time. But that has degenerated. It makes no sense, huh? It does to me.
Time to accept the fact.


Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Quality Revisited

I have seen ISO9001:2008 at work and I must say that I'm a true
believer that these certifications mean squat. Remember my post about
KL Monorail's recent quality management announcement? Well, to THEM,
certification means taking more than a week to get an escalator fixed
and allowing chaos at the interchange stations during rush hour.
Trains brimming. Stations brimming. Splendid.

So much for that.


Sunday, April 19, 2009


The latest updates are in for my underwear collection! Here are the additions:

Dugas + 1
2xist + 2 (ehsan KH)
DKNY + 1 (ehsan KH)
Private Structure + 1

Hehe. :).


Saturday, April 18, 2009

The Great Singapore Skank II: Domestic Drudgery

Taking a cue from Apollo, I woke up at 7:45am to "ready my man" for work. However, KH was the one fretting over me, making me breakfast of hamster grains and milk (so tiring to chew that sawdust). I walked with him to the bus stop to send him off and familiarise myself with the layout of JJ's condo area. It felt good waving him off... A strange feeling. But a good one. Back upstairs, I started my domestic drudgery by ironing his clothes. I suspect that he was purposely delaying his ironing in anticipation of my arrival. :P. With that out of the way, I went online and by 11:00am I was preparing to go out to meet KH, JJ and K850i for lunch at Hachi Tei. Had a nice lunch of chirashi don and JJ even managed to get a discount off the bill. K850i was regaling us with tales of his dragon-boating. Never fails to trigger imagery of tanned hunks exerting themselves... yummy!

With KH (he came all the way from Paya Lebar just to see me for lunch, muacks!) and JJ having to work, K850i was designated as my tou guide for the day. He brought me to POD's art gallery at Tanjong Pagar, but not before sending me on a detour to see Play's latest renovated look. POD was nice enough to show us around and he even dug up authentic Japanese woodblock prints for me to see. While waiting around for him to get off work, Nic suddenly made an appearance and became my second tour guide. They brought me to the nearby Red Dot Museum of Design, showcasing award-winning designs in varying categories and applications. Nic was smitten with the "Morph", a wearable piece of technology that looks like something straight out of Star Trek. The next stop was the URA Center to view the Draft Master Plan 2008. The Urban Redevelopment Authority of Singapore oversees the development of Singapore and it is revised every five years. It is a comprehensive plan that covers all the infrastucture and socio-ecomomic development in Singapore. Great way to check whether your HDB would be demolished for a future MRT station.

Dinner was at a Shanghainese restaurant near POD's gallery. Great servings of xiao long bao, wo tiet, cha chaing mien, and Shanghai pizza (like some kind of circular, flat currypuff). KH, JJ and I then went shopping at Raffles City Shopping Center. JJ managed to get a couple of size 28 slacks (so scandalously small, kan!?) and KH bought a work bag. My crankiness level had reached 6/10, so we headed home. At Eastpoint Mall, I stopped to have a Mr. Bean's celery soya bean drink. Definitely therapeutic.


Friday, April 17, 2009

The Three Words

Three simple words. KH and I use it so often that I sometimes fear
that it would lose its potency and meaning. In our countless daily
SMS, we sign off with it. At the end of our nightly phone
conversations (or phone sex, :p), we say it to each other in addition
to the standard "good night". But tonight, KH suddenly spoke the three
words shyly mid-conversation. I thought he had office gossip to share
or some update on upcoming trips. It sounded so sweet to my ears and
rang out loudly though it was a whisper compared to our usual
conversational tone. Amused and elated at the same time, I replied him
in the age-old manner, "I love you too", after making him repeat it
three times. Lol.

I still feel warm and fuzzy and inexplicably happy. And of course, a
little bit horny!


Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Earth Hour

I had my very own Earth Hour when I got home from work yesterday. The
lights were out for a couple of hours, so I can even rephrase it as
Earth Hours. Had a candle-lit dinner and I read a bit of the papers by
the flickering light. Luckily it rained, so I didn't miss the fan that
much. Even my CDMA phone line died. As time stretched on, the only
natural thing to do was to stuff my mouth. Before I knew it, the light
was back on. Tomorrow, the saga continues. No water for twelve hours.


Monday, April 13, 2009


Easter marks one the holiest days in the Christian calendar as it
commemorates the resurrection of Jesus Christ on the third day after
he was cruxified and died for the sins of mankind. For the Church and
the faithful, everything hinges on this belief.

However, I find myself having the skankiest of SMS conversations with
Potato Bill on Easter Sunday. Not about religion of course, but the
Easter Bunny side of it. Talks of easter eggs with creamy fillings,
white chocolate bunnies that one would chew on the whole day,
rummaging one's easter basket for goodies and treats... Never will I
look at the Easter Bunny the same way again!

Happy Easter everybody!


Saturday, April 11, 2009

The Great Singapore Skank I: Touchdown

Golden Panda
Swiped from williamnyk.
In case you don't know, I actually have 48 days of annual leave left and I'm desperate to clear them off before my company forfeits 'em all. Hence, I made a leave plan that will allow me to do so, IF the work schedule permits. Heaven has been kind enough to let things fall into place and I was granted a week's absence from the office. And so, I flew down on JetStar to Changi Terminal 1 (over-rated, IMHO, but immigration was fast and it was short way to the belt). The flight was a bit bumpy, but that was expected with the weather and small aircraft. Read in the in-flight magazine that getting a Singapore Sling at the Raffles Hotel is a must-do! Sei lor. While I was waiting at the arrival hall, I overheard the most "precious" phone conversation:

He was telling me like the girls he was flirting with... and I was like screw you... I'm at Clark Quay at the moment and I can just snap my fingers and guys would come after me. He cut me off! Called me later to say sorry. Saying that it wasn't proven that he was flirting and that I shouldn't say such things. Whatever! And my mum was giving me shit just now. She blew a fuse when I told her I wanted to stay over at his place. I said like, mum, I'm not coming home with a baby or anything, ok? .... yaddda yadda yadda

Drama. Stupid. Spoiled.

Jaded Jeremy picked me up at the airport with a huge bear hug and brought me home to Simei. I felt very welcome by the full blooms of Frangipanis and Golden Pandas. Natural bunga manggar! Freshened up a bit for dinner at East Point with KH and Simone, his di. Very likable. The first stop was at 18 Chefs, but we left before ordering and ended up at Eatzi. The former had quite a complicated menu of fusion Italian food, but Eatzi was bad. Out of the frying pan, into the fire! I had fish parmagiana with cheese. And the set was complete with mushroom soap (yuck!), garlic bread (yuck!), tea and dessert (couldn't tell what flavour the ice cream was, but it was kinda like nona!). KH commented that the waiter looked a bit like a hobbit, and I agreed! Imagine being served by Sam Gamgee! Felt like I was Frodo Baggins. Post-dinner entertainment was Citadel (a card game) back aj JJ's place. He had given me a 15-minute crash course earlier. >_<". JJ won, cause I let him. :P.

Finally rejoined with my KH. It was awkward at first, but we quickly found each other...

Wednesday, April 08, 2009

Happy Days

Just came back from my week long visit to Singapore and the Monday
that I started work on was quite a bitch-- Unfinished business and
issues that my colleagues conveniently KIV-ed for me, awaiting my
imminent return. But I must give credit that they did a great job of
covering for me. Well, the shit was eventually settled, and naturally
more shit was generated. Even so, I was quite surprised that my
crankiness was quite under control. My voice had a calm quality to it.
I did not feel like venting. The break did me much good it seems. A
getaway from work works wonders for my temper. And the sex, definitely
the sex. LOL. FYI, the BF is flying down for Easter, so the "holidays"
can begin again!


Thursday, April 02, 2009


Swiped from K!T.
During my visit to the DAP CNY open house this year, I bumped into a very pengsan uncle by the name of Loo. He wanted to have his photo taken with one famous, unmarried DAP MP, so he employed my help. I should have just shut up and took their photo with his cellphone. Regret hardly covers what I'm feeling for offering to do it with my camera. So, we exchanged contact information and I got his address. It took me some time to develop his photo as my sister wanted to do bulk processing, so I piggy-backed his photo on her batch. And this caused me heartache to no end. He kept on calling me, asking about the status. Day and night. So desperate to see the photo. And when I finally post the photo to him, stupid POS Malaysia f*cks up and takes more than a week to deliver it and this causes the old fart to call me many-many more times. One day, he caught me during a bad day at work and I just kinda blew my top. Told him off. As though I was trying to keep the photo from him! Pissed, I pressed him to give me his daughther's e-mail address so that I could get it over with, he dilly-dallied and put down the phone.

Later, he called me at midnight. I couldn't be bothered. Apparently, my letter finally arrived. If you think the story ends here, you're wrong. He now wants the soft copy so that he can develop 100 copies by himself then rub his naked body over 'em. Arghhhhhhhhh....

P.S.: Thanks to SK and Apollo for helping me kau tim the CD-R for the Despo uncle.

Wednesday, April 01, 2009

Ingenious Thai

Coming back from a short trip to Haadyai, my colleague gave me a keychain as a souvenier (gah!). However, it's not as boring as it sounds. It's actually a metal keychain of two people having sex. Perky tits and a horse cock. And it has moving parts, mind you! With some help, the "guy" can f*ck the "gal" doggie style (other positions are available, trust them to come up with variety). Like some kind of X-rated shadow puppets. Cute, ain't it? Although I would have preferred it to be two guys, the quality is bad enough that the "gal" can be mistaken for a deformed "guy". So the next time you're in the Land of Smiles, do try to get some of these erotically-educational keychains.